It is frankly hard to believe that CM Punk has been gone from the WWE for more than three years now. He was an integral performer for years and was in many ways the bridge between fans, the brass, and this new-ish breed of independent wrestlers that have made their way to the WWE recently.
Yet after a nasty divorce from the company, and some well-publicised podcasts, he’s been able to follow some of his other passions and has stuck with the proclamation that he is done with pro-wrestling. He certainly seems well settled in his life away from the squared circle, despite getting his choked out on his UFC debut, and appears keen on pursuing the MMA path further.
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Nevertheless, there has been some buzz (or faint hope from his diehard fans) that his contempt for pro-wrestling has softened slightly. This is apparently enough to leave certain wrasslin’ fans watering for another pipebomb from the Second City Saviour.
I’m not about to go down that rabbit hole until we hear something more substantive than acknowledging one or two wrestlers on Twitter. What I will do, however, is recklessly speculate on the possible timeline that could have occurred in an alternate dimension, where Punk had remained with the WWE through to the present day.
The purpose is to throw out a potential storyline or two we would like to see Punk in if hell does freeze over and he ever steps foot back in the WWE. Failing that, just consider this my two cents towards becoming a booker for the big show one day, and just have a laugh.
Unfinished business
Let’s begin with the Royal Rumble aftermath in 2014 and the assumption that he would have locked horns with Triple H at Wrestlemania XXX. Though Kane of all people had done a concussed Punk dirty and eliminated him from the match, this would surely have only been filler before the main course.
The real life animosity between Punk and ‘Aitch seemed apparent for years even when the two were buddies on-screen. If they’d brought up even a fraction of the resentment about the Kevin Nash debacle for example, or taken turns on the mic about the other being a mere ‘B+ player’ compared to their standard as workers, this would have been fire!
WM XXX
Punk vs. HHH
Lesnar vs. Reigns
Orton (C) vs. Batista
Bryan vs. Sheamus (C)
Cena vs. Undertaker
So let’s presume that Wrestlemania XXX would have gone down more or less like this.
Daniel Bryan gets a significantly shorter end of the proverbial stick here, but the capacity was there on the card to divide the top belts up once again (why would the Authority have put their champion and all their eggs into a chamber match with no help!).
Sticking the WWE title back on the red-headed stepchild of McMahon and Triple H might not be to everyone’s liking, but they have some ‘Mania history and it's better than Kane vs. Bryan (Hell No indeed).
I’m also going to take some liberties with the rest of the card while I’m here, by switching up the painfully mediocre Lesnar vs. Undertaker matchup. Roman Reigns, the prodigal’s son, gets an early crack at the Beast Incarnate whilst still tolerable in his role with the Shield.
Having humbled the start of the relentless Roman push, we are left with the only closer capable of compensating for Bryan not being in the main event. The impact of John Cena beating the Streak in the final match on the landmark 30th edition would still be ringing across the pro wrestling landscape today.
‘Taker was obviously willing to do business in New Orleans and Cena would be a more than worthy candidate. Crucially, off of this, the Cena train would have no choice but to embrace the reality of a situation that has been plain to adult fans for years: he’s the biggest heel in the company.
Get rid of The Authority
Over the course of the next year the ‘A+ company players’ are graced further by their perennial pushes, but this time the favouritism shown towards Cena, Orton, Sheamus, etc… is clearly evident in storyline as well as in their feuds against true fan favourites.
Trying to keep Reigns face in this scenario could be troublesome, although the presence of the perfect foil to the establishment in Punk would greatly help, as would keeping the Shield together.
Given Bryan’s injuries and Lesnar dropping out, for the time being, Punk and the Shield would still be the driving force of the show, but definitively the fan-backed parties against heel factions.
The storyline of finally getting The Authority off screen forever should do more for loyal fans than what really happened with Rollins breaking up the band and Lesnar being cheered for destroying their top face.
WM Play-Button
Ambrose vs. Orton
HHH vs. Bryan
Rollins vs Sting
Wyatt vs Punk
Lesnar vs Undertaker
Reigns © vs Cena ©
Then comes Wrestlemania at Levi’s Stadium, which is all about getting rid of the brass permanently. I’ve allocated Bray Wyatt to Punk here because clearly getting him and the members of The Shield over is more important.
Factored in is the punishment Punk had taken over the years, so he too has to slip into more of a part-time schedule (heal up first, then we’ll talk about the main event). Providing he would still be with us, I can imagine he’d be more inclined towards building the likes of Wyatt, Rollins and more NXT alumni rather than the garbage booking he had in his final year with Brock and Ryback.
Relatively soon after ‘Mania though, I would give him some serious time off, because in this wonderland Lesnar has taken off and is leaving a bloody trail in his wake. Instead of kicking into gear in the final eight months of his deal as the WWE actually did, I would make sure Brock has signed on for another three years and do it properly from the off.
No losing to Cena or inexplicably going 50:50 with Trips (last gripe, he no longer exists in this universe). First he squashes Taker’s comeback attempt in empathetic fashion, then sends Bryan into retirement, goes onto halt Punk’s charge for redemption, sends Cena packing to film TV, and takes the undisputed title from Reigns with as many suplexes as it takes for the fans to show him some sympathy.
Finally in the main event
Royal Rumble 2016 (oh what brilliance that show was) is now much more interestingly poised with genuine anticipation as to who is going to main event with Brock at the biggest show ever. Countdown to no.30 and… ‘look in my EYES, what do you SEE’ and its clobbering time to close the show.
Yes after years of putting it off, the WWE is finally putting Punk in the closing spot at ‘Mania. Lesnar needs an extraordinary showing to justify being a part-time champion, but Punk is more than capable of being the dance partner.
Why go back to this well you ask?
Not only did Punk get the best match out of Lesnar in the first three-year cycle, but Brock has now been built for a year as the top guy by both Heyman’s declaration AND dominant booking. He would have beaten ‘Taker, Cena and Reigns (the past, present, and future if you will) multiple times, and significantly changed the WWE landscape.
“What my client has accomplished as the undisputed conqueror, is the change you are incapable of producing Punk,” Heyman could have wheezed. “I saw potential in you when I brought you in, but for all your pipebombs and promises of ice cream bars, you slipped right in as a shiny new cog in their machine.”
Punk could have then retorted with, “A cog in their machine?! Do you see that 80’s throwback next to you? Brock Lesnar is the epitome of a one note, uninterested, muscle head who had the blind faith of everyone backstage before he’d even laced up his boots. Your beast is the final brick on the wall that I have given everything to break down, and at Wrestlemania, I will show you, him and everyone who doubts my dream that I am the Best in the World.”
Heyman could have then said, “You and I had the same dream for a time Punk, and I’m sure your buddies from New Japan and Ring of Honor who are backstage now thank you for your trailblazing. Unfortunately, your dream and passion blind you to the reality of the single greatest athlete to ever step foot into a WWE ring. You see, anomalies like my client will always be better, more box office and simply too devastating for you everyday voiceless punks. Even your most vocal saviour.”
I will concede that I cannot do Heyman or Punk justice in their promos, but hopefully, you get the idea. Picking on Punk’s public interest in fighting should only add more fuel to the fire in the lead up to the clash at AT&T Stadium in Dallas.
WM Cowboy’s Star
Undertaker vs. Sting
Ambrose vs. Reigns vs. Rollins
Lesnar (C) vs. Punk
The feature matches here are a little skinny because as fans will probably remember, an injured and otherwise depleted roster did not deliver a good ‘Mania. The main event hopefully covers up for this, as does the Shield triple threat to establish each of them as main event talents without going overboard.
The Undertaker-Sting dream match would just be icing on the cake, with ‘Taker returning for one Last Ride after losing back-to-back and end his ‘Mania career with a win. A heel ‘Taker representing the last we see of Vince on TV as the quintessential company man would certainly give the match an intriguing dynamic.
Ultimately a great feel good moment when ‘Taker wins to end his story at 22-2 and Tombstones McMahon for good measure, would be an immeasurably better send off for the Deadman than what we were given recently.
As for this main event, I don’t believe Punk would or even should actually beat Brock. If the hate for Punk still remained backstage I would even consider a ‘Money in the Bank’ run-in post match to technically take away the closer from Punk.
Whether a new face would finally get one over on Lesnar, or better yet Brock beats a second guy on the night, the story has been told with Punk helping to elevate the title once again and save this terrible show.
Keep on going as the Best in the World
There is some condolence for Punk with the brand split though when he is shifted to SmackDown as their top face and essentially does what Cena actually did in 2016-17. No mixed tag against the Miz and Maryse in Orlando though, the ultimate reward I am going to give Punk is the obvious match of the night against AJ Styles.
WM Sunshine
Styles vs. Punk (C)
Lesnar vs. Goldberg (C)
Reigns vs. Rock
To clear up a few things, Brock would have been drafted first as the WWE Champion to Raw in the Brand Split. Since he had cleared the competition, for the time being, his UFC 200 excursion would have made more kayfabe sense (this is a reach for the WWE to let their champion head off into a real fight) and wheels could have been spun in the meantime to decide on a challenger from either brand.
A victorious King of the Ring for example in Randy Orton could have lead to their Summerslam clash to bring the title over to Smackdown. In Brooklyn, we have a typically brutal match but with a surprise run-in from none other than Goldberg.
Orton steals a win, and an irate Lesnar is declared Universal Champion as compensation and sets his sights on a Survivor Series main event that I think we can all imagine. Sorry Kevin Owens and those early shenanigans with the Universal title, I don’t buy any of that being necessary.
Back to Punk, he is enjoying his time on the blue brand to the tune of becoming WWE Champion again at some point and he gets another 5-star classic with AJ some months later. The Rock coming back one last time with his cousin (or something like that) might irk him a bit, but is undoubtedly a main event that looks the part and might be the only way the WWE ever drag Dwayne Johnson back from Hollywood.
One last crack at the main event could be on the cards if Punk were to stick it out to the bitter end (particularly back on Raw), but I’d almost be ready to call it a day. Whether Punk does ever return to settle a beef with Triple H, put over another young guy, wrestle a new opponent in a dream match, or even main event with a beast, CM Punk honestly does not have anything more to prove.
What do you think Punk would have done if he’d stuck around, and is there potential for him to come back in 2017 and do it anyway? Leave your comments.
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