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Birthday depression, sometimes known as the birthday blues, is characterized by apathy and a lack of joy or interest in one's own birthday.
Birthday depression can include sadness as well as feelings of low energy or inclination to dwell on the past, including anything you may or may not have accomplished so far in your life. These emotions may manifest in the days before a person's birthday, on their actual birthday, and for a while thereafter.
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Birthday Depression: Why It Happens
While birthdays are a day for celebration and fun, that may not be the case for everyone. A few reasons why you or your loved ones may experience this kind of depression are:
1. Unreasonable Expectations
Nobody can deny the stress that comes with birthdays. On certain important occasions, like Christmas, you can find yourself crumbling under the pressure to feel joyful and cheerful. In fact, people frequently assume that you will certainly celebrate your birthday and be happy about it.
As a result, what ought to be a fun time might instead turn into a chore and a letdown at the same time. Friends may be unable or unwilling to participate in the festivities, family members may forget, and the day itself may end up being chaotic and difficult. Despite this, you are forced to smile, which contributes to birthday depression.
2. Major Setbacks
Your birthday is a time to celebrate with your loved ones, feel safe in their company, and express your gratitude. What happens, though, when some of them are gone? What if you have experienced huge losses? You feel their absence more acutely on this day than any other, which can make you nostalgic, depressed, and hopeless.
3. Reflecting on Identity and Growth
The fact that your birthday forces you to take stock of yourself is one of the main causes of birthday depression. In a symbolic sense, it denotes the conclusion of a cycle and asks you to reflect on your past successes and mistakes.
However, there is a lot of societal pressure associated with age. For instance, you may have expectations about particular milestones in life, such as graduating from college, landing a well-paying job, getting married, and starting a family. These are also your individual ambitions, which you might have anticipated achieving by this point. Reflecting on what you could or couldn't manage to achieve may contribute to birthday depression.
How to Cope with Birthday Depression
While birthday depression isn't an official diagnosis, it can be difficult to manage and cope with the symptoms alone. Here are some tips to make your birthday feel better:
1. Begin Your Day Right
A smart place to start is by making an effort to think positively right away. This will put you in a good state of mind for the rest of the day. It could also be a good idea to start each birthday by making a gratitude list.
Other ideas include making a special breakfast and doing something joyful to start the day, like watching a movie in bed or going for a morning run. If someone has to go to work on their birthday, they might think about treating themselves to a drink or other tasty treat on their way to work to brighten up their day a little.
2. Manage Expectations
It will be easier to avoid disappointment if you are honest and objective about what to anticipate from a birthday. This might be especially true if it involves getting calls from relatives that one might not get along with very well.
No matter how the day might turn out to be, one should try to reflect on the good things and be grateful for any effort, no matter how tiny, that friends and family make. Doing so will make you realize how unique you are to them.
3. Keep Yourself Busy
Shopping, going to the movies or just catching the sunset can give you something to take your mind off the things that may be troubling you. Being passive makes it easier for negative thoughts to consume you, but by keeping moving, you can keep your focus on what the day means to you.
Being busy on your birthday doesn't mean that you are ignoring your concerns and problems. Rather, it becomes a time to reflect on what you have achieved throughout the years and look at them more objectively.
4. Make the Most of This Day
If you can reflect on the causes of your birthday depression and find solutions that you can adopt to beat them, odds are that you can find some way to learn from them and make your next birthday even more fulfilling and joyous.
The benefits of aging have been demonstrated in several studies. One study looked at participants between the ages of 21 and 100 and found that older people's self-reported mental health tends to improve. According to a different study, younger people have higher rates of neurosis than older people.
Even if someone is experiencing unhappiness or dissatisfaction on their birthday, they can utilize the occasion to reflect on what is making them feel this way rather than dwell on it. After that, they can try to figure out how to deal with the issues and negativity around these feelings.
Takeaway
There is no need for birthdays to be gloomy occasions. People should remember that a birthday can be anything they want it to be. Birthdays can once again become enjoyable if people can let go of those negative emotions and make plans for them. This acceptance can help you deal with birthday depression.
Janvi Kapur is a counselor with a Master's degree in applied psychology with a specialization in clinical psychology.
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