5 daily habits that are in reality your trauma response

There are types of trauma responses that we display. Our responses as adults are borne out of the emotional wounds we experience in our childhood. These worked as survival mechanisms to protect us in the past.

Once we start to heal our trauma, we can understand our trauma responses, have deep self compassion for ourselves and learn healthier coping mechanisms for whenever our triggers show up.

A common way in which these responses continue to manifest are our daily habits that conceal trauma responses.

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Daily habits that conceal your trauma response

Unaddressed trauma can manifest in every-day life. (Image via Freepik/Drazen Zigic)

Not all of the following habits are a consequence of childhood trauma, but they're the most common ones.

Often we forget the pervasive nature of trauma in our everyday life. Even when the traumatic experience is long lost, its impact may continue and show up in these five daily habits:

1) Over-responsibility

Yes, overresponsibility is a trauma response. A very common influence of trauma in everyday life is not being able to set healthy boundaries.

Some of us tend to take the responsibility for others, especially our family members. If you're the eldest child who has undergone trauma, you know that this is a real feeling. You can't stop taking responsibility even though, they don't really want it.

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2) Oversharing

Oversharing trauma response is also a common one. In fact, this can be a way for you to establish control in a volatile environment.

It may be the only way for you to seek validation or attention, as you never received it earlier. By repeating everything, you may be able to desensitize yourself to the details. It's a porous boundary that you set with others.

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3) Perfectionism

Perfectionism is a way to handle it. (Image via Freepik/ijeab)

Unhealthy perfectionism is a common way to conceal your past and subconscious memories.

It's an excellent way for yourself to show that you need to live up to each and every expectation. This striving towards perfection becomes an evidence that you can do everything to protect yourself. Perfectionism can influence mental and physical health.

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4) People pleasing

A common element of trauma response is the feeling of rejection. You may have been rejected by your family members or someone else in the past.

It becomes typical then for you to please everyone around you to gain social acceptance. By people pleasing or fawning, you assure a place in the group. By winning others, you earn a chance at love and affection.

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5) Negative self-talk

Negative self-talk comes up. (Image via Freepik/Freepik)

Trauma influences how you see yourself and the way you talk to yourself. There's power in self-talk, even when it's negative.

Have you heard how you speak to yourself? Take five minutes, and notice how you speak to yourself. If you have experience traumatic injuries, you develop a negative perception of yourself. As a consequence, you hold yourself responsible for something.

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Once we become aware of our trauma responses in adults, we learn that we can have different choices in the future of how to respond. That can be really difficult at first, but with the necessary help, you can learn to establish boundaries for mental health, focus on self-care and learn emotional regulation strategies.

Trauma responses are survival strategies, but in the long run, you need to work on them. A mental health professional can assist you in managing internal experiences.

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Janvi Kapur is a counselor with a Master's degree in applied psychology with a specialization in clinical psychology.

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