We need to talk about Jadeja

During the financial crisis of 2008, I was part of a Quiz team that called itself the Lemon Brothers (clever word play alert on Lehman Brothers). Every time the team name was called out, the audience would break into fits of laughter. But the context was soon forgotten and we started to draw blank expressions. “Why Lemon brothers? If nerds need a team named after a fruit, won’t Apple be more apt? And is lemon a fruit or a vegetable?”

So we looked around for a team name that would knock people off their seats. Enter February 2009. Enter The Ravindra Jadeja fan club.

Club Rule Number One: Move towards the right side and shake your head violently. Very violently.

Ravindra Jadeja Fan Club was a good choice. It always got a reaction from the crowd. Even today, people clutch their stomachs and mosquitoes fly together to spell large LOL patterns in the air as soon as the name is announced. It does not matter if he wins a dozen man of the match awards or donates his kidneys for your younger sister’s operation – something about the man is an evergreen punch line. That man is amusement and people like to laugh at him.

So, what is so funny about Ravindra Jadeja? Why can’t cricket fans take him seriously? More importantly, does he deserve to be taken seriously ? The answer is tricky so we have to go unconventional.

We need ( drumroll) the Handbag test.

To check a cricketer’s mental strength, imagine you are together on a train. Would you give the cricketer your handbag to look after when you go to the loo? Dhoni,yes. Yuvraj certainly. The good natured Suresh Raina may even put in some cash of his own into your bag. What about Jadeja? Yes, what about Ravindra Jadeja?

While taking a leak, you would be afraid that when you return the bag would have been thrown out of the window, not because Jaddu has criminal intentions – but because no one told him that bags are not meant to be thrown outside. And then he would take a step to the side and shake his head violently. Very violently.

The point is even after an extended run, Jadeja come across as a clueless person. He has the air of a virgin intern left alone in the White House.

Ok, I confess. The handbag test may not be as scientific as it sounds. So we study the stats.

Club Rule Number Two: Repeat three times. Ravindra Jadeja is not the Abhishek Bachchan of Indian Cricket.

The most popular debate around the country, after that missing century, the rotation policy, the question about 48th or the 50th over, the long rope to Rohit Sharma, the angry Virat Kohli, the defensive Dhoni, the…ok…my point is… one of the burning issues that we should be addressing is whether Jadeja is the best number 7 that we have. Is his astounding bid value in a domestic twenty-twenty tournament translate into a natural right of way into the International side? Seriously, is there no one better than him? Do we trust the suspicious looking articles that have popped up post the IPL auction, hailing him as the great Indian hope? Who is writing these pieces, and why are they seen more in business newspapers as opposed to the sports page? And while we are asking so many questions, whatever happened to Poonam Pandey these days?

As far as numbers go, after playing around 50 ODIs, Jadeja averages around 30 with the bat and takes 1 wicket per match with the ball. Not exceptional, yet not that bad since that particular position has traditionally been India’s weakness – with the freakish exception of MSD. Even Ravindra’s cousin, the controversial Ajay Jadeja averaged around the 30 run mark for his first fifty matches. Of course, Jadeja Sr floated in the batting order more and was arguably a better finisher during the dark ages when India’s lineup excluding Tendulkar would fold up like a hidden exam cheat chit.

If you consider some of his peers, Yusuf Pathan, who is often mentioned in the same breath but with a deeper voiceover, has scored around the same number of runs but they have come much faster. In fact, Pathan on an average gets 33 runs more than Jadeja per 100 balls. Yet, as a bowler in terms of wickets taken and economy rate, Jadeja outperforms Pathan.

Fielding wise, Jadeja is better but Yusuf Pathan is more likely to send shivers down the batsman’s spine whenever he burps after a drink’s break.

As far as mental strength is considered, Jadeja is a fighter (whenever he is off the field). He won the Under-19 cup with Kohli in 2006, earned the Indian cap in 2009 and then had to undergo the hearbreak of getting dropped. Lesser men would have given up. In the IPL, he was banned for a year and he came back stronger, even if it was with that ridiculous haircut. When questions were raised about his inability to clear the fence in the shorter version – the man went Popeye and started hitting some big ones. He returned to the Indian side and played well in England. Somewhere in the interim, he found the time to get involved in a brawl at a pub.

If Pathan is the hammer, Jaddu is the Yo – Yo of Indian cricket. He keeps coming back, with different sun glasses all the time.

Club Rule Number Three: Wear those Sunglasses all the time. Yes, we mean all the time.

So where does this leave us with Jadeja ? Is the journeyman from Jamnagar meant to provide comic relief, taken seriously, or envied for what the franchise thinks he is worth? Is he the best Indian all rounder today? These are questions that perhaps MSD has to answer, for it is a team that he has to live with. Jadeja doesn’t turn the ball much, yet somehow manages to be somewhat economical and take the odd wicket. As a batsman, he looks prone to buckling under pressure – yet somehow manages that standard 20 ball 22 type of score. He is not a one trick pony, yet he does not seem to have much up his sleeves. He is somehow, somewhat in a blue jersey.

He is the Scott Styris of Indian cricket. Not too talented, but with some value.

Now, do we need a player in that mold? Don’t we have enough talent who can get fifty odd runs every third or fourth match. Even if you flip roles in the present setup, Raina does not bowl do too badly. Ashwin, a spinner is fast turning into a useful bat. Then there is the mercurial Irfan Pathan. The batsman are bowling as well as Jadeja does, and the bowlers are batting as well as he has so far. So the question, with the top order struggling so much is Mr. Somehow, Mr. Somewhat for how long?

Anyone who has a triple hundred in a first class match must have some serious ability. The challenge for him is to turn into more of a batsman in terms of seeing his side through. So Jadeja quickly needs to get over the mindset of this being a ad-hoc assignment and take the job of winning matches for India more seriously. A number 7, who the captain trusts with the bat – yet does not trust him enough to hit the big ones is an enigma the team does not have the luxury to solve. Jadeja has to get busy at the crease, instead of looking busy.

As a bowler, the ridiculous argument about left hand right hand or whatever it was – and not bowling him in a recent match is almost criminal. Unless he was not hundred percent fit, Jadeja ( and we will never know if he did) should have gone up to Dhoni and said – Hey! I can bowl too. But is he enough of his own man to do that?

The danger for Jadeja is his career being reduced to a role of a Jester. It is time he drops the Alfred E Neuman clueless look. It is time he stops trying to please the captain like a hapless lackey, and become more of a professional cricketer.

It is time Ravindra Jadeja stops throwing the handbag out of the window.