Cricket 2012: In Pictures

1. Doug Bollinger shows Katy Perry a thing or two at the IPL opening ceremony.

2. A key theme for 2012 seemed to be ‘How much money can you throw at a mediocre club cricketer without him feeling a sense of shame?’ For Ravi Jadeja, the figure seemed to be in the region of $6m for six weeks’ work. In 2012, Ravi Jadeja also made his Test debut, which pretty sums up India’s year.

3. RIP Deccan Chargers. Dale Steyn continued to entertain, and his celebration to dismiss South African teammate Richard Levi – who began the year with a fat IPL contract, and ended up fatter – will live long in the memory. You terrorize a batsman, then have the audacity to yawn in his face? Psychological warfare just got cool.

4. Kolkata Knight Riders won the IPL, but the image that became etched into our eyelids was father-of-two Shahrukh Khan celebrating his team’s victory in the final. It was one nipple slip we could have done without.

5. Michael Clarke enjoyed an annus mirabilis, becoming the first ever batsman to score four Test double centuries in a calendar year. He also made a ton of money in the IPL for a handful of games, which probably came in handy when he flew back to Australia midway through his stint, for his wedding to Kyly Boldy. Here, we see a picture of a couple in perfect bliss. But, it’s too perfect, isn’t it? No couple should be allowed to be this happy – I mean, for the love of God, he’s holding her heels, which is basically just showing off. That white horse? Probably a de-horned unicorn, just to make us plebs feel slightly better.

6. The Maasai Cricket Warriors left their humble town in Kenya for the first time, and travelled all the way to Cape Town, where they participated in the most scenic of environments. Read more about them here!

7. Denesh Ramdin scored a century against England at Edgbaston, and then took out a now-famous note, that he kept in his pocket as ‘personal motivation’. (thanks to @AlternateRowan)

8. Kevin Pietersen almost certainly has a p****s, but spent the whole English summer waving it in everybody’s face.

9. The South Africans reached the pinnacle of Test cricket in England, thanks in part to some unorthodox pre-series training, as they climbed pretty big hills in Switzerland.

10. The Olympics came to London, but was notable only for a nation rising in protest against an uber-defensive field setting on a greentop.

11. Chris Gayle returned to international Cricket in 2012 after a prolonged hiatus. He celebrated by aping Gangnam Style, a pop song in a foreign language with no ostensible redeeming features, barring the ending.

12. The World T20 was held in Sri Lanka. This photo confirms that Afghanistan were present.12+1. After a bout fighting off seminal germinoma in his lung, Yuvraj Singh returned to a hero’s welcome for India during the World T20.

14. Pakistan’s fielding reached a nadir, and their fielding coach Julien Fountain resorted to his famously innovative measures. Here, he replicates a firing squad in an attempt to inject some life into the potatoes standing 20 yards away.

15. The West Indies won our hearts all over again at the World T20, with an awesome series of powerhouse performances.

16. Some pictures speak a thousand words. This one, with umpire Asad Rauf, speaks just three: “PLAYERS GON’ PLAY.”

17. New Zealand wanted a new coach, so they hired Harry Potter. Just like Harry Potter, Mike Hesson will never coach a successful Black Caps team, or get laid by Emma Watson.

18. India’s visually impaired side beat Pakistan in the final of the inaugural World T20 tournament.

19. South Africa hold a guard of honour for Ricky Ponting, who retired from international cricket in December.

20. Michael Hussey announces his imminent retirement from international Cricket, and suddenly, 2012 transformed into a horrible year for Cricket.