The Dirty Dozen: India's playing XI and then some

Ishant Sharma

Mahendra Singh Dhoni - The Boss Man (C) (WK)

India would like MS Dhoni to portray all 4 members of the A Team. As the captain, he must have the foresight and vision that Hannibal did; he needs to be the man with the plan. As a number 7 batsman, Dhoni needs to be more Gilchrist than Gooch, a savage counter-attack is more his style. Perhaps he could combine the brutality of B.A Baracus and airy nonchalance of Face. A dash of reckless abandon a la Murdoch and England will get a good workout chasing leather, not to mention the catching practice the crowd will get.

However, it seems unlikely that he will divert from the blueprint he has used in Test cricket until it is too late, but it is worth noting that his best innings have come while playing freely. The thing with Dhoni is that, with his technique, he could edge behind any moment. He would be better served fighting fire with fire, powerful driving, cutting and pulling along with aggressive running is the way forward. As the leader, he must seize the initiative and not wait for things to happen on their own. If he must mirror his one-day cricket, let it be in his cool, calculated batting and not his captaincy. It may be time to ditch the detached ice-man persona for the proactive Mr Freeze.

Ravichandran Ashwin - The Spider

India would like Ashwin to do 3 things this tour: take wickets, keep proving that 8 is too low for someone of his obvious ability to bat, and, most importantly, not run any of his teammates out! He spoke before the tour of not being comfortable with a holding role and said that attacking was more his strength. If he can manage that on green wickets with no assistance for spinners, kudos to him. But Dhoni will probably want him to keep his attacking instincts in the locker until England’s second innings and control them like an Indian parent in the first dig.

He needs to resist the impulse to act like a kid at show and tell and bowl all his variations, less is more. His job is to act like a spider, subtly weaving his web, luring the batsman in and pouncing. As a batsman, he has the silky touch of the above mentioned arachnoid, and he would do well to contribute lower order runs. The best thing about his batting is not his good technique, but the fact that he thinks like a batsman and is willing to construct an innings. A role as a night-watchman may be in order.

Bhuvneshwar Kumar - The Sniper

Bhuvneshwar Kumar will have to pick his spot. He isn’t express pace, so he isn’t going to intimidate anybody. He is, however, blessed with exceptional control and the ability to swing the ball both ways. His role will be to bowl an attacking line with the new ball; he has the stamina and willpower to bowl a 10-over spell and that is where he will be most effective. For the most part, though, he will need to act like a sniper and be patient with his line and lengths. He won’t run through teams when the ball gets older, but he could force the batsman into a mistake by controlling the flow of runs like a good irrigation officer. He will be a handful if conditions suit him, but discipline will be the key.

Ishant Sharma - The Work Horse

Ishant Sharma seems to have everything going for him: pace, bounce, height and a happy knack of taking wickets at the right time even when he is bowling rubbish. Having played more than 50 Tests, he should be leading the attack, but, unfortunately, he keeps flattering to deceive. A lot was spoken about his untapped potential 7 years ago, and here we are 7 years later with a whole lot of potential just begging to be tapped to go with a bowling average of 38. That’s not good enough, and perhaps we should stop expecting Ishant to be a strike bowler.

Instead of trying to mould him into something he is not, Dhoni must use him in the way that will maximize his effectiveness, if not his potential. For all his faults, he is a bowler who will run in selflessly all day, willing to do the dirty work. If Dhoni says jump, he asks how high. His job will be to bowl the long spells; if he bowls a couple of beauties along the way, that will be an added bonus. He could be used to bounce out the tail but, for the most part, he’d better pick up his broom and put on his apron. Hard work beckons.

Mohammed Shami – The Missile

Perhaps it is a bit unfair to expect a bowler who has not yet played 10 Tests to lead the attack, but that is exactly what is expected of Shami. He has a lot going for him: pace, seam movement, reverse swing and a huge heart. Ideally, he should be used as a shock weapon; used strategically and sparingly; bowling short, fast spells at crucial junctures, but that may not be a possibility in a 4-man attack. He is inexperienced and may leak runs going for wickets, but, right now, he’s the closest thing this team has to a strike bowler. Crucially, he is the only member of the attack who can pick up a wicket at any stage of the game, and that’s really all that matters.

Ravindra Jadeja – The Moustached One (12th Man)

Technically the man in possession of the spinner’s birth, Jadeja is unlucky to miss out on selection. However, he has already helped India’s cause by using his Jedi mind tricks to get the ECB to sack Kevin Pietersen. He could come into contention if Ashwin loses form or if Dhoni breaks the habit of a life-time and picks 5 bowlers. As a bowler, he toils tirelessly holding up an end and performing a holding role, but he is a handful on a turning 5th day wicket.

As a batsman, he is a ball of energy but needs to temper his stroke play with caution. As a fielder, he is equal to none, chasing the ball like a bounty hunter who sees his quarry escaping. Even if he does not play, he will have an important role to play in mentally disintegrating England by menacingly twirling his moustache and uniting the nation with cries of SRJ! SRJ! SRJ!