Humour: Venkatesh Prasad's application form for the job of India coach that was rejected

DISCLAIMER: This is a work of fiction. Not intended to be derisive. The comments below are not real.

Application form for the job of head coach for the Indian Cricket team

(Affix photo here)

- Name: Venkatesh Prasad

- Age: 46 years

- If represented India: Yes

- If yes, in what capacity: (Note: wrong answer will result in disqualification): Fast bowler, pace bowler, sorry .. gentle medium

- Why do you think you are the right person to coach team India? : Because I've watched “Chak De India” 72 times in theatres and 51 times on my laptop. Also, I know SRK’s "sattar minute" speech in the movie by heart.

- Your opinion on DRS: Don't know. Prefer RDS (Rawa Dosa Special).

- Instances of aggression shown by you: (Mention any two) (This question is at the instance of Saurav Ganguly)

Send off to Amir Sohail in Bangalore 1996

Shouted at a waiter in an Udupi restaurant once for serving me watery sambar.

- Best compliment received: From Anil Kumble "yard or two faster and you will be as quick as me".

- As a coach what would you bring to the table: My laptop

-Achievements: Have my name on Lord's roll of honors.... Also on Venky's chicken rolls.

-Technology in Cricket you prefer and why?: (select any one)

a) Hawk eye b) Hot spot c) Ultra slow motion

Ans : Ultra slow motion. Because it is inspired by my real time bowling speed.

- Have you been convicted of any offences in India:

NO!!! Just accused of boring TV viewers to death with my commentary .

Also, 2 people died laughing when they heard me give tips on fast bowling to Dale Steyn in the IPL.

- Please list three professional references:

Rajat Bhatia

Vinay Kumar

Ashoke Dinda

V Prasad(Signature)