Shut the Fox up and a Pavopta Stats preview: England v India, Only T20, Old Trafford, August 31 2011

After all this rather passéTest cricket it’s back to serious, er, business on Wednesday with the arrival of England’s T20I encounter with India at Old Trafford. It seems a bit of a lose-lose for India. If they’re beaten they’ll be castigated for losing yet again. If they win, the result will be held up as an example of just how IPL and money-obsessed the entire BCCI set up is to the detriment of the Test team. For me, the main interest lies in Ravi Shastri’s armpits, which were generally as profuse as his lovable bullshit whilst reporting pitch side during the IPL. As a consummate perspirer myself, it will be fascinating to see if his icy run-ins with Nasser and the rest of the English media over the summer have cooled him down a bit.

India at least warmed up well by beating the Leicestershire Foxes on Monday, and, although he notched a duck, MS Dhoni at least had the pleasure of a rare tour victory to savour as well as being the recipient of an honorary degree from De Montfort university after the match. Ashwin also played in the match and I’ll look forward to watching him bowl tomorrow, and particularly to left-handers after his complete flummoxing of Chris Gayle on a couple of occasions in the last IPL, including a dismissal that effectively ended the finalwith 19 overs left.

“Doctor, Doctor. How will I feel after the operation?” “Well, of course.”

A win is a win, but India’s at Grace Road may in part have been assisted by a Leceistershire side who were quite possibly in a state of some celebratory disrepair after having taken the English domestic T20 Championship on Saturday evening. For a team that has flunked their way to bottom of Division Two in the four day format, it was a special achievement brought about by hunting in packs in the field and the outstanding boundary catching of substitute Matthew Boyce, who ensured four Somerset fielders were caught in a Cobb web in the final.

The win also allowed a glorious swansong for keeper Paul Nixon who will now have to have another one or two in the Champions League T20 tournament. “Badger” is a fierce competitor who deserves every success but I haven’t quite bought into the massive Nixon love that’s been doing the rounds because his constant in-play chirping really gets on my tits. I’m aware that’s exactly what it’s designed to do to the batsmen he’s stood behind, but surely sledging should have some element of spite or humour to it? Nixon just seems to spout utterly aphoristic banter, a sort of cricketing Vernon Kay to Ian Healey’s George Carlin. Anyway, regardless of my very much minority view quibbles, there’s absolutely no doubt he has been an outstanding servant to Kent, Leicestershire and English county cricket as a whole over the last 20 years. His stunning catch in the final to dismiss Pollard also reminded everyone that he’s not a man to be swept away on a tide of farewell smaltz either. It was an outstanding piece of athleticism at a crucial time to dismiss a crucial player so well done, Badger, how’s your wife and my kids etc etc

So, after that comprehensive look ahead to the match, here are some equally relevant stats:

• England and India have played each other only twice before in T20Is with one win apiece.

• Since beating Australia in May 2010 to win the World T20I Championship, England have won only once and are on a losing streak of four.

• India have won their last four T20Is.

• Old Trafford hasn’t had the best of luck as a T20I ground in the two games it’s hosted: An easy England canter over New Zealand and a no result/abandonment between England and Australia.

Enjoy the match if you can!