10 funniest yet offensive chants in English football

The English Premier League might not be the best league in Europe as far as quality of football is concerned but it is by far the most entertaining. They owe this success to a few factors, be it the tempo at which the games are played or the competitive nature of the league in general.

One of the major factors is that the crowd is closer to the ground creating a great atmosphere for the fans, even those sitting on their couch at home.

As English is by far the most popular language in the world, it becomes easier for the fans at home to understand the songs and chants coming from the terraces. While most of the chants are about glorifying their respective clubs, there are a few that bring a smile to one's face for the sheer savagery in the content matter.

Here are the funniest/offensive chants from the birthplace of the beautiful game.

#1 Physical appearances

Fans can be brutish while going after players with certain imperfections in an individual’s physical appearance.

When former Liverpool player, Luis Suarez's goal was disallowed in the dying minutes of the Merseyside derby the blue half of Liverpool had their say. The chant has very simple lyrics going along the lines of "your teeth were offside.”

Arsenal's German playmaker Mesut Ozil has a similar chant sung to him by the "other north London club", replacing the word teeth with eyes for obvious reasons.

Liverpool went a step further unleashing a morbid chant towards Chelsea striker Diego Costa calling him “the elephant man”, for his stocky built.

#2 Chelsea’s history

Chelsea have seen a meteoric rise in establishing themselves as a major player in the Premier League since the club was acquired by Russian billionaire Roman Abramovich. If they thought the "historical major clubs" would welcome them to the big leagues with open arms, how wrong they were, with both Liverpool and Manchester United taking shots at their new found success.

Liverpool reminded the London club about their unrivalled European success along with 18 top division titles.

Lyrics

F**k off Chelsea F.C, you ain't got no history5 European cups and 18 leagues, that’s what we call history.

United, on the other hand, taunted the London blues on their inability to win a hat-trick of Premier League titles, a feat United have achieved twice.

Lyrics

Hollow Hollow Hollow

Chelsea’ s success is f*****g hollow

All the money they took from the big Russian crook

And you’ll never win three in a row.

#3 The Manchester banter

In the last six premier league seasons, the title has landed in Manchester four times with the red and blue side splitting the difference. United fans often have a dig at their cross-city rivals about their low attendances with the chant claiming the Etihad has 20000 empty seats.

Lyrics

The City is yours,

20,000 empty seats,

Are you f**king sure?

City, however, came back strong after thrashing the red devils 6-1 in their own backyard with a similar chant, mocking the United fans for leaving before the game had ended.

Lyrics

It's only 3-1 It's only 3-1! 30,000 empty seats It's only 3-1.

It's only 4-1 It's only 4-1! 40,000 empty seats It's only 4-1.

It's only 5-1 It's only 5-1! 50,000 empty seats It's only 5-1

It's only 6-1 It's only 6-1! 60,000 empty seats It's only 6-1

It should have been 10, It should have been 10

You lucky bastards, It should have been 10!!

With the fiasco of the 2013 Champions League, United fans returned the favour with a hilarious chant about the forgettable competition.

#4 Player mistakes

In 2008, two English clubs competed for the UEFA Champions League final for the first time in the tournament's illustrious history. It was a day to forget for Chelsea legend John Terry, who missed the deciding penalty, but United fans have made it a point to remind him of that night every time the two clubs lock horns.

Lyrics

Viva John Terry

He could have won the cup

but he f****d it up

Viva John Terry

Chelsea fans found a victim of their own in Liverpool captain Steven Gerrard, whose slip put a huge dent in the Merseyside club's hopes of a title in more than two decades.

Lyrics

Steve Gerrard Gerrard

He slipped on his f*****g arse

He gave it to Demba Ba

Steve Gerrard Gerrard

Even though the 36-year-old has now moved to America the English fans make it a point to sing about the famous slip whenever the chance arises .

Lyrics

Have you ever seen Gerrard win the league?

Have you ever seen Gerrard

Ever seen Gerrard

Ever seen Gerrard win the league

Have you f**k?

#5 Spurs fans in a drubbing away

There is a famous chant in England "you only sing when you win". Tottenham Hotspur fans have clearly never heard that one. In a game against Liverpool at Anfield, they found their team 4-0 down.

Starting off with a chant claiming that they would win the game 5-4.

When the goal did not arrive they decided to take matters into their own hands and decided to celebrate a goal that was never coming.

As the game progressed, it became evident that it was not going to be Spurs' night, so the spurs faithful asked the reds to score a goal for them.

#6 Self-depreciate chants

Spurs fans aren't the only ones to mock their team when the performances haven't been up to scratch . Queens Park Rangers came up with a chant about their inability to win away matches sung to the tune of the lion sleeps tonight.

Lyrics

We never win, We never win (x4)

We are the Rangers, the mighty Rangers we never win away.

Nottingham Forrest and West Ham fans were critical of their respective teams while undermining their opposition's performance West Ham players while being down 6-0 at the Etihad stadium would have heard their fans letting their City counterparts know that they were nothing special beating the Hammers . Even some of the City fans found it funny giving the then Upton Park faithful a round of applause.

Forrest fans broke out a hysterical chant mocking their opponents, who were 4-0 up, that they had only managed to score 4.

**#7 The shger club**

Infidelity has been a problem in football for quite a while but it does not stop rival fans from bringing it up at the first chance they get.

John Terry was caught in a major scandal when his affair with his best friend Wayne Bridge's ex-girlfriend came into the limelight. After a host of trolls depicting the Chelsea captain as a sex addict appeared, Stoke City fans came up with a chant when a few decisions went against them in a game against Chelsea .

Lyrics

He’s sh*g*ing the ref, He’s sh*g*ing the ref

John Terry, he’s sh*g*ing the ref.

They even went as far as to mock Terry's teammate Frank Lampard, that Terry was "sh*g*ing" his wife as well.

Lyrics

He’s sh*g*ing your wife, He’s sh*g*ing your wife

John Terry, he’s sh*g*ing your wife.

When England captain Wayne Rooney admitted that he had visited "massage parlour" and prostitutes before getting married, he would have mentally prepared himself to face the backlash from fans. A few reports suggested that he had been intimate with a 48-year-old lady. Hence "fat granny sh*g*er".

Lyrics

Fat granny sh*g*er, you’re just a fat granny sh*g*er

#8 Sexual assault chants

If Wayne Rooney gets so much stick for “sh*g*ing a granny", Adam Johnson would have been naive to think football fans would forgive him for "performing sexual acts " on a 15-year-old Sunderland fan.

Manchester city fans came up with a chant stating that they had won the league with a paedo on the wing.

The more popular one is definitely the one where fans tell Johnson to f**k off. The lyrics go something like this.

So f**k off Adam Johnson,

you're going down for noncing,

you're a pedophile,

you're a pedophile.

Robin van Persie had to face the heat as well when he was accused of sexually assaulting a woman in Rotterdam . Even though the case was dropped for lack of evidence, but fans still have their fun.

Lyrics

She said no Robin, she said NO (x3)

Oh Robin, she said no.

You’re a c**t Robin, You’re a c**t (x3)

Oh Robin, You’re a c**t.

#9 Stan Collymore

This one is a chant that's definitely catchy and funny, but when you understand the lyrics and the reference one does cringe. Derby fans have an unhealthy relationship with Nottingham forest, where Stan Collymore played for two years before joining Liverpool for a then English record fee of £8.5 million.

The chant mentions Collymore's physical assault of ex-girlfriend Ulrika Jonsson in Paris in 1998. But wait that's not even the worst part.

The song ends with Collymore breaking his leg in a game against derby while playing for Leicester, a game that the rams won 3-0.

Lyrics

Collymore's a w****r, he wears a w*****s hat,

he was a Forest b*****d, and then a Leicester t**t.

He went out with Urika, and beat her like an egg,

and when he came to Derby he broke his f*****g leg.

#10 The ballad of the pie

When your team has already demolished your local rivals in a derby, what do you do? Well, most fans just mock their opponents or just sing about their past heroes,but not Bradford city fans.

As a fan starts eating a pie in the stand , the supporters let the entire stadium know what he was enjoying. It does not stop there. They go on to enquire if he has enough sauce.

The fan seems to be enjoying the attention has he continues enjoying the pie. It gets better when someone passes him some brown. As the chant gains another stanza, the supporters just keep on singing.