Arsenal: positively (un)neighborly behaviour by Chelsea and Spurs

Will Arsene Wenger lead Arsenal to a Top 4 finish yet again? (Getty Images)

If Arsenal are going to pull off what has become their annual miracle of qualifying for the Champions League this year, it is certainly not going to be with the help of their neighbours. Going into the final month of the season, the Gunners had the easiest run in compared to their London competitors Chelsea and Tottenham Hotspur.

To be fair, each of those clubs did drop unexpected points at the start of the run in, but the inept Gunners decided to promptly return the favour, drawing at home to Manchester United, who were already picking out their spots on the beach, and then to Everton. There may be an interesting side note there about the two United managers – outgoing and incoming, launching a pre-emptive strike to eliminate the Gunners as potential challengers next season. No Champions League would mean less money, possibly prompting a Stan Kroenke fire sale.

I had the dubious privilege of watching Spurs vs. Southampton and Aston Villa vs. Chelsea plus, potentially, the juiciest clash from a Gunner perspective, Chelsea vs. Spurs. For the best part of a week my mind had been furiously doing its sums, trying to figure out which result would be best. If you think there are only 3 options, let me educate you on what separates a fan from a Gunner for life. Do you get greedy and wish a pox on both their houses, with the prospect of sneaking into 3rd place? Would a Chelsea win knock the wind out of Spurs’ sails, leaving us needing just a home win and a tie to clinch 4th? Or would a Spurs win be best, with Chelsea playing Villa away and a tough last game against Everton, while Spurs had relatively easy closers with Stoke and Sunderland? Was Stoke away really that easy? Would Everton have nothing to play for and gift one to Chelsea as the vacationing Man U did? As it turned out, a pox on both their houses it was and my mind had to start doing a fresh set of sums.

I had watched Southampton incredibly dominate Spurs at White Hart Lane. However, the lack of a goal bode ill and led to an increasingly queasy stomach. There it was – Gareth Bale, jinxing his way to left at the top of the box, an incredible off-balance strike – nothing but net. We need to make the Champions League, just so Bale can move on to Real Madrid or other greener pastures. The following weekend, it is like déjà vu all over again, this time once on-screen on Saturday and once off-screen on Sunday. I see Aston Villa, with the guy who heads my Arsenal off-season wish-list, Christian Benteke, taking the lead with a thing of beauty by none other than the man himself. To add to that, a piece of luck – Ramires gets an undeserved red card and Chelsea are down to 10. Just when Villa begin to dominate play and a second goal seems to be in the offing, Benteke commits a stupid foul and gets the red he might have well received for his earlier infraction.

The entire world must have heard or felt, if not seen, my head droop. Two minutes later, Lampard pops in the equaliser and I wait for the inevitable Chelsea winner. Lampard again, to seal his name in Chelsea history – top scorer of all-time. (Rumour has it that Roman Abramovich wants him out of there – another “popular” move by the owner and a fine reward for sealing Chelsea’s spot in the CL). Next morning, I anxiously look at the match reports – Spurs have a tough game, away at physical Stoke. Like Villa, Stoke take the early lead, only to see Clint Dempsey equalise from a fortunate break with the Stoke keeper caught off the line. A late winner completes the (un)neighbourly sequence.

Despite all this, the Gunners are still masters of their own destiny. Two wins and we are in. Aye, but there’s the rub. The first must come against leading relegation candidates, Wigan. Home at the Emirates and we ought to ink, rather than pencil, that one in. Except, Wigan took last year’s fixture in similar circumstances 2-1. Not to mention, they just topped Manchester City for the FA Cup. Then, if we get that W, we have to win at Newcastle. Yes, Newcastle of the infamous 4-4 “loss”. Tuesday’s game comes down to whose Houdini act is stronger – Arsene Wenger and the annual Champions League rabbit, or Roberto Martinez and his annual relegation escape.

Chelsea and Spurs have shown they want it. Time for the Gunners to do the same.