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Yesterday, we saw in part a hypothetical wish list of the supporters of different EPL clubs that good old Santa Claus will have to consider. Today, we are carrying on in the same vein. So folks, take no offence and see the lighter side of all the opinions expressed below!
EVERTON & FULHAM
Everton and Fulham occupy 12th and 14th positions in the league table respectively. Everton have won 5 games out of their 14 while Fulham have tasted success in 3 out of their 15.
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Let’s do away with the statistics and talk a bit of reality, shall we? I don’t think I would be wrong to suggest that Fulham are precariously placed in the 14th position! Martin Jol recently described the Fulham job as the toughest position that he has ever held. True, that’s because he seems to have no idea where to develop the team. I mean if it wasn’t for the bling American rapper’s lucky goal vs. Liverpool, his managing credentials would have come under the scanner.
He showed the same face to Bobby Zamora!
They stumbled to a defeat at the Liberty against promoted club Swansea this past week. Fulham now find themselves in a lower league position than all the three promoted clubs. That is something Jol will have to address, albeit immediately. Another issue that he should sort out is the alleged “issues” surrounding Bobby Zamora’s place at the club. If Bobby finds another club in January and Jol fails to find a replacement, then Fulham have more chances of fleeting with relegation danger than they are now.
So what would be the wish of Fulham supporters…? Guesses…?
Nah, you got it all wrong folks! They don’t expect their chairman Al – Fayed to bring in a marquee signing or change the club like in the way Sheikh Mansour has transformed Manchester City. All they want of him is to get rid of the Michael Jackson statue!
Al – Fayed with the King of Pop (R.I.P) outside Craven Cottage!
That’s what they want. They don’t mind seeing their club getting relegated because they have been there in those last minute relegation battles more often than once. That’s why they STILL BELIEVE in their club!
Meanwhile in the blue half of Liverpool, Bill Kenwright continues to press his claim that he is the biggest Everton fan alive – Period! It is funny how often the media these days find nothing else to talk about Everton than their poor financial situation. Nothing to poke fun at but I still haven’t figured a way out to stop amusing myself with the thought of Everton dangerously dangling over the relegation zone!
I don't want to see Everton going down.
David Moyes believes that without a proper and steady cash injection, Everton will not be getting anywhere. He’s right. All clubs need money for proper administration. But that is no excuse for the pathetic performances of his players. I don’t know if anyone noticed it but Everton, bar the Merseyside derby, hardly attack upfront. Loan signing Royston Drenthe (Oh, you thought Louis Saha!) was responsible for most of the attacks but with him now injured, Everton have gone back to Plan B which is to put the viewers to sleep while watching them play!
David Moyes is truly worried.
Victor Anichebe is scheduled to return this week. But Moyes can add a good attacking option in the form of £10 million rated Zamora. However, Everton fans are confused. The reason…” Where is the cash…SANTA?”
Hey don't look at me pal! I'm BROKE too!
LIVERPOOL
Anyway, so what’s cooking in the red half of Merseyside? I’ll tell you what is. The FA charging them left, right and centre has been the talk of the town. Liverpool FC has hogged the limelight more times than expected this year. First it was their chairman Ian Ayre with stupid comments about Bolton Wanderers. Then it was the turn of Raul Meireles. He promised the Scousers a good reason for his departure but hasn’t given one yet! Then it was Pepe Reina’s autobiography in which he talks about drinking beer, driving on the wrong side of the road, thinking Jamie Carragher was from another planet because he couldn’t understand one word that came out of his mouth – so a good read I guess!
For Sale! But not around my place – I enquired!
Moving on, Luis Suarez has managed to skip from one controversy to another despite relocating to another country. He was banned for seven games, while with Ajax, for biting an opponent and was given the red for deliberate handball in the World Cup quarters, he has now been charged for giving the finger to Fulham fans (I’d say that is bling!) on top of the existing charge for alleged racist abuse against Patrice Evra.
Go on Luis.. That's my boy!
Kenny Dalglish has no financial worries unlike his fellow countryman over at Everton. But he has midfield worries. Steven Gerrard has been out for some time now and all that we know is that he is recuperating well. When will that recuperation process get over? Only the folks at Melwood will know. But that can’t stop the media from speculating. So Shinji Kagawa is it or Christian Eriksen?
Shinji Kagawa
Christian Eriksen
I’d say forget about the midfield, we’re fine in that department. But not so much in the firing department! When other people all over the world will be singing a Christmas Carol to Jesus, Liverpudlians will be singing to Andy Carroll. I can vouch upon anything that I possess that there won’t be a better Christmas gift for the Scousers than to see their £35 million man score more goals. I mean, the number of times the Liverpool forward line have managed to hit the post or failed to convert goal-scoring chances is alarmingly high.
This poor conversion rate will sooner or later become a cause of bother for Liverpool and I guess Kenny Dalglish is a little hesitant in admitting it to the press. Just look at how we let Norwich, Sunderland and Swansea walk away with a point at home. It speaks volumes of the change that is needed.
So then, who do you think should Liverpool buy in January? I’ll give you a few choices. David Villa? Robert Lewandowski? Gonzalo Higuain? Lucas Moura?
This is a privilege that I grant to all Liverpool supporters out there. Let me know about your top choice of player that you want to see at Anfield this January in the comments section below. And I promise you that I’ll forward all your valuable suggestions to Santa Claus! Ho-ho-ho!
MANCHESTER CITY
The Arab spring is in full swing in the blue side of Manchester! What else could the fans wish for? It is a club that is capable of assembling a dream XI with the world’s expensive players in it (even if it means having to pay £150 million for Nicklas Bendtner!). It is also a team that is fully capable of punishing a player by paying him his monstrosity of a weekly wage and yet won’t let him play!
Remember this guy??
I think this transformation of Manchester City is perhaps years and years of true supporters’ wishes coming true. Think about it, 35 years of Christmas wishes falls on Santa’s deaf ears. And then one fine day, Santa thinks enough is enough and he accepts that he hasn’t helped this group of people for long. So as the Devil’s (no doubts here, it is fergie and his boys!) atrocities became borderline unbearable, Santa gifted the Citizens with the ultimate gift – Sheikh Mansour!
And we all know the result of that —
Still can't stop laughing!
Ahem! Anyway, the most famous Christmas song which we love to sing and dance for is, without a doubt, Jingle Bells! But I don’t think the Citizens will quite do that. Why?
They are happy to be at the top of the summit in PL standings despite their early exit from the Champions League. They are now considered a global force to reckon with in the world of football (which is funny considering they have not even managed a full season at top or beat Villarreal with any proper conviction, damn the media!). But all of this was possible because of one man and sorry folks, but that is not Roberto Mancini. It is the person who appointed him. And I don’t mean Gary Cook or Brian Marwood either! It is the Abu Dhabi Sheik.
Mansour lifted City's hopes.
So here is a possible version of Sheik Carol that can be rendered by City supporters for the entirety of Christmas!
Folks, remember again. This is not meant to insult or offend anybody or their beliefs. Just see the funny part and leave it at that.
MCFC Christmas Carol: (to be sung in the same rhythm as jingle Bells)
“Oh, Sheikh the bells, Sheikh the bells
Mansour all the way
Oh, what fun it is to beat the scum (MUFC)
In a one-horse title race! ”
“Oh, Sheikh the bells, Sheikh the bells……..
Before I start, I’d like to take this forum to wish Darren Fletcher a speedy recovery from whatever that is holding him back, health wise. Get well soon, Fletch!
Darren Fletcher is on an "extended break"
Ok, I guess that’s all there is to say about this club. Ciao!
I’m not being funny here because there really isn’t anything spectacular to say about them. Apart from getting knocked out of CL by a comparatively smaller club that nobody in Manchester had heard of until then, getting knocked out by a Division I club in the League Cup that made Darren Ambrose a household name around the world and drawing Man City in the third round of FA Cup – everything has gone spectacularly wrong for fergie ever since the disaster at Old Trafford happened!
And yet, despite having a record ten players out injured Ferguson still thinks that Wesley Sneijder isn’t worth his wages. All that I got to say is if Wayne Rooney is worth his weight in hair, then Sneijder is worth his weight in gold! So Ferguson, clean up your act and start whining about the referees again!
Christmas Carol will continue…
