Humour: Christopher Nolan confirms plans for Interstellar-sequel 'Ibrastellar' featuring Zlatan Ibrahimovic

Christopher Nolan unveiled the poster for Ibrasellar.

Note: There is very little spoiler in the article because we appreciate the work Christopher Nolan has put into to make Interstellar. If you have already watched the movie, it will be easier to understand the inside jokes in the article.

With Interstellar blowing minds everywhere in the world with its gimmicky storyline and dimension overdose, director Christopher Nolan has already revealed his plans for a sequel to his 9th movie which will feature, to the surprise of most of us, three of football’s most celebrated stars, Zlatan Ibrahimovic, Jose Mourinho, Pep Guardiola.

Nolan has declined to give out a release date yet, but he was kind enough to leave out a big detail, which is the name of the movie: Ibrastellar. Nolan also gave out a few other details over the plot for this sequel, which again surprises me since he has never done that before. Wait, was it Nolan or.. holy.. wait it was them. Who? They?

Who are they?

The story is said to be set 240 years later from the first installment when Matthew Mcconaughey is finally dead. It was his daughter, Murf’s great-grandchild who had to finally kill off Mcconaughey’s character because that dude just didn’t die. No more Space girls and anti-ageing for you, Cooper.

A fan-made illustration of Guardiola’s Black Hole: (the only place where the sun doesn’t shine)

Zlatan Ibrahimovic, who will play the lead role in the sequel, will face off against the Gargantuan Black Hole, the only character from the first sequel who is not dead, or old. Instead, Gargantuan will be portrayed in a human-like form, played by another debutant and Ibrahimovic’s former boss at Barcelona, Pep Guardiola. Like Ibrahimovic, Guardiola’s name will be the one used for their characters.

It was revealed that Guardiola’s Black Hole will be the movie’s main antagonist, and will be directed straight towards Planet epicLOLz, our current planet. epicLOLz has been the home for Earthlings since the last one was destroyed following a nuclear war between South Korea’s Kim Jong Un and the Smurfs. The South Korean dictator figured that perhaps the smurfs lived underground, and nuking the whole surface sounded like a good solution to him. D’oh!

Ibrahimovic will be playing the role of epicLOLz’s saviour as he will be only human in the universe capable of opening a wormhole through his nose called the Ibrastellar, thus the name of the movie.

According to Nolan, Ibrastellar demanded a middle-aged Michael Caine with a Portuguese accent, and Jose Mourinho was the man to go for. Mourinho will play a younger Michael Caine, who will dedicate his entire life to save the planet from Guardiola’s black hole.

Mourinho will have to put-on a lot of make-up for his role.

Scarlett Johansson will be joining Nolan for a movie yet again as she has been confirmed to play Ibrahimovic’s love interest in the movie. This decision came after Ibrahimovic made a straight request to Nolan to either cast his wife, Helena Seger or a good looking blonde in the movie. Nolan went for the blonde Johansson instead.

The news has come to a shock for car-manufacturing company Toyota who had earlier paid Mcconaughey to drive in their Lexus commercial, now only to find out that the actor will be replaced by Ibrahimovic. Toyota, who are now annoyed to Nolan’s decision, have signed Lionel Messi to replace Mcconaughey as their driver in their commercial.

The Barcelona forward will be seen saying, “I scored goals before they paid me to score goals,” in the commercial.

Disclaimer: This is a satirical piece only meant for humour purposes only.