Flagrantly early, incredibly half-baked EPL predictions

What’s football without a bit of banter, obsession, disappointment and the never-ending gossip. And then, there is fortune telling. We get ahead of ourselves this year to predict what’s really going to happen in the 2013/14 season of Premier League.

Our group of football fans, Ayush Roy (Manchester United fan), KC (Arsenal fan), Parth Shah (Manchester United fan), Matt Vincent (Preston North-End faithful), Sherry Phillips (Chelsea fan) and myself, Souvik Roy Chowdhury (Newcastle fan), get together to give their lowdown on what could and should transpire in this season’s English Premier League.

Matt Vincent

Mourinho’s Chelsea will look to repeat the feat

Champions

Chelsea

The return of the Special One is the final piece to the most dangerous team in England right now. Having had an entire season to learn each other’s game, Juan Mata and Eden Hazard should be unplayable, and if the slightly less impressive defense can hold its own through this next Premier League season, Chelsea are going to be hard to stop.

European Spots (Top 6)

(From first to sixth) Chelsea, Manchester City, Manchester United, Arsenal, Tottenham, Liverpool

Manchester City and Manchester United will be close yet again, but this time, for the second spot. Arsenal are going to surprise many with the development of Theo Walcott as a goal scorer and Jack Wilshere as the man feeding him from the middle. Tottenham will fall further behind their North London rivals as numerous changes and impending loss of Gareth Bale will take its toll on the newly formed squad. Liverpool would be higher than this if I had any faith in their widemen or on their ability to keep Luis Suarez and more importantly, keep him happy.

Relegation

Crystal Palace, Hull City Tigers, Southampton

Ian Holloway’s attacking mentality will make Palace everyone’s favourite team to watch in the EPL this season, but it is not the right way to keep a team lacking talent in the Premier League. Steve Bruce knows how to manage in this division but you can’t cover up a bad team and Hull have the worst squad in the league by some distance. The Tigers were lucky just to get promoted last season. Southampton had a great season last year, if not by results then certainly by performances. I’d love for them to be able to build on that in this campaign but I have a creeping feeling that Second Season syndrome is going to take effect at St Mary’s this year.

Best Player

Eden Hazard

The Belgian was sensational in his inaugural season in the EPL, and fits perfectly in Mourinho’s counter attacking system. Now in sync with Juan Mata and the rest of the Chelsea attack, expect even more goals and assists from the young winger in 2013/14.

Top Scorer

Robin van Persie

It won’t even be close. There are too many players sharing the goals in most EPL teams, whereas at Old Trafford it all goes to the Dutchman. He showed in the Community Shield game that he still has the ability to consistently find the net. In fact, if Rooney moves on from the Manchester club, van Persie’s tally should be even higher than last year’s campaign.

Breakout Player

Phillipe Coutinho

He showed glimpses of his brilliance last year, and no-one in the league outperformed him over the last ten games or so. With a full season ahead to demonstrate his quality, everyone will be talking about Coutinho this time next year.

Best Transfer

Roberto Soldado

Tottenham are in need of a striker who can poach goals from wide deliveries and be a real nuisance in the box. Soldado should fit in perfectly and give the North London club something around 15 goals this season, which will be more than any other transfer will be able to muster.

Biggest Disappointment

Fernandinho

With a big price comes big expectations, and I don’t see how Fernandinho will sparkle in a team that already sports Yaya Toure, an improved version of the Brazilian.

Three off-the-hook predictions

Luis Suarez to leave the Premier League for good.

Jack Wilshere to remain injury free throughout the campaign.

Di Canio’s Sunderland to earn a top half finish.

Sherry Phillips

City want the title back from their neighbours

Champions

Manchester City

Manuel Pelligrini and his tactics with the new signings will make the difference for The Citizens. When given the opportunity to spend in his own way, he can orchestrate an already world-class team to glory.

European Spots (Top 6)

Manchester City, Chelsea, Arsenal, Manchester United, Tottenham, Swansea City

Mourinho’s here for stability instead of instant success. Last year he spent a lot on players at their peaks. He is more concentrated on youth this time. I see the club narrowly miss out on the title though. Wenger’s inability to pick up a player from the market is disheartening for the Gunners. They’ll however get into the panic buy mode and will push more than ever before to finish third. David Moyes is another one who is struggling to bring in players. After the foreseen failure in landing Fabregas, the former Everton coach still has to fix his midfield. To top their problems, they have a disgruntled striker on their hands who wants to move away. A hard season for United, but they will come good in the end, like usual. With Roberto Soldado on board, Tottenham have a fix to their striking problems. If they can keep hold of Bale, they might end up finishing fourth, however, that looks highly unlikely. I expect Swansea to confidently hold on to the 6th position. With Michael Laudrup bringing in Wilfried Bony from Vitesse and Michu used to Premier League, I don’t see them having much trouble.

Relegation

Crystal Palace, Sunderland, Southampton

With the loss of Wilfried Zaha, I don’t really see them doing well in the Premier League. Many would still argue that it was Gianfranco Zola’s Watford who deserved the promotion. Paolo Di Canio is a motivator, though I really have my doubts on whether he can lead them to safety. They barely escaped last time around, but I predict them to fall out this year.Also, gut feeling says it will be Southampton this year.

Best Player

Roberto Soldado

I have a feeling Soldado will be the best player this year around. AVB’s time at Chelsea may have been marred by his firing but he introduced English football to Juan Mata. He has a certain eye on spotting talents that not many have. I expect him to fit in fast and go all guns blazing on opposition defense.

Top Scorer

Robin van Persie or Roberto Soldado.

Breakout Player

Marco van Ginkel

Have a lot of expectations riding on him and the lad has immense amount of talent. If he keeps his head down and work hard, he’ll be world class in a few years.

Best Transfer

Roberto Soldado. Maybe, just maybe, Alvaro Negredo or Jesus Navas.

Biggest Disappointment

Fernando Torres

Much is to be seen as to how he’ll perform under Mourinho. Hopefully he finally adapts and starts scoring consistently.

Three off-the-hook predictions

The goal line technology works wonders.

Another final match day title decider, depending on goal difference.

More tactical innovations for the tactical enthusiasts to enjoy.

Parth Shah

Tottenham to finally finish in the Top 4?

Champions

Chelsea

They have the best squad, the best manager and great signings. While others play catch-up, Chelsea will run away with the title

European Spots (Top 6)

Chelsea, Manchester City, Manchester United, Tottenham, Arsenal, Everton

The usual suspects, Chelsea, United, City will be there for sure. Martinez is a fantastic manager, and Everton could surprise people with their performances. Tottenham, with Soldado, should be breaking into the Top 4.

Relegation

Hull City, Stoke City, Crystal Palace

Mark Hughes is out of his depth in the EPL, and he will take Stoke down. The other two because they are promoted teams and are an easy bet.

Best Player

Juan Mata

He is entering his prime and Mourinho knows how to get the best out of his playmakers. Think Sneijder at Inter, Ozil at Madrid. Now it will be Mata at Chelsea.

Top Scorer

Roberto Soldado

A bold prediction, but he is capable of scoring 30 goals in a Spurs team.

Breakout Player

Oscar

One of the best talents around, and I think he will be great to watch.

Best Transfer

Stevan Jovetic

Same as above. It’s a brilliant transfer.

Biggest Disappointment

Gareth Bale

If he stays. Last season was a one-off, I don’t think Bale can top that. Anything less than 10 goals a season from Bale will be seen as a bad season.

Three off-the-hook predictions:

Spurs going the distance and getting a top 4 finish

A genuine 3-horse race between Chelsea, City and United

Bale to stay and bang in 40 goals. The EPL needs him

KC

Stoke City on their way to the Championship!

Champions

Manchester City

It will be between City and Chelsea, and I think City has enough quality to pip Chelsea for the title

European Spots (Top 6)

Manchester City, Chelsea, Manchester United, Arsenal, Tottenham, Liverpool

There won’t be any changes in the Top 4, though Liverpool will pip Everton for the 6th spot as Martinez will take time to make his players adjust to his style.

Relegation

Newcastle United, Hull, Stoke City

Russian Roulette is easier than predicting who’ll take the fall but I would go with these three clubs. No explanations really, apart from the fact that Newcastle have fallen after their Europa League finish a couple of seasons back, Hull will drop back down and Stoke City won’t be any good without Tony Pulis and his tactics.

Best Player

Robin van Persie

Top Scorer

Robin van Persie

Breakout Player

Kyle Walker

He’s got talent and he’s put in quite a few performances last season.

Best Transfer

Jesus Navas

He can do what Walcott fails to do at a number of times, runs at defenders and beats them.

Biggest Disappointment

Arsenal and Manchester United

Their summer spending has left me stupefied. Seriously, both clubs need reinforcements, especially in light of what their rivals have been doing.

Three off-the-hook predictions

Less referee controversies

No irresponsible tackles

Arsenal winning a trophy

Ayush Roy

Jesus Navas – Best signing of the summer?

Champions

Manchester City

With the sheer amount of quality they have signed, it is hard to see past them for the title. Their squad depth is commendable and will come in handy as the season wears on.

European Spots (Top 6)

Manchester City, Chelsea, Manchester United, Tottenham Hotspur, Arsenal, Liverpool

This might finally be the year when Tottenham step foot into the Top 4. Especially after the kind of money they have spent, nothing short of a Top 4 finish will do for AVB and his men. On the other hand, Arsenal, with exactly the opposite fortunes in the transfer window, will make way for Tottenham. Besides those, we have our usual Manchester clubs and a particular West London club in the running for the top three spots.

Relegation

Stoke City, Crystal Palace, Hull City

Stoke without Pulis is as good as a Championship side already. Crystal Palace might fly high at the start, but will run out of juice midway, much like Blackpool of season before the last. Hull City, well, need to have a proper squad in order to compete, which they don’t.

Best Player

Robin van Persie

Anyone who disagrees may speak now or forever, hold their peace.

Top Scorer

Robin van Persie

Only one man scores for United nowadays, Robin van Persie.

Breakout Player

Adel Taarabt

After a horrible stint with QPR in the Premier League, it is time for Moroccan talisman to live up to his early potential with another London club.

Best Transfer

Jesus Navas

The guy is quick and can beat defenders effortlessly. What else do you want in a player?

Biggest Disappointment

Andre Schurrle

The German might have signed for Chelsea, but where will he play in the attacking line-up that consists Mata, Hazard and Oscar?

Three off-the-hook predictions

Goal line technology having a positive effect

Tottenham to finish in the top four

People to understand how good a manager Sir Alex was when Moyes struggles with the team he inherited

Souvik Roy Chowdhury

RVP means goals for United – Top scorer again?

Champions

Manchester City

None of the rivals except Tottenham at the top have fortified themselves like City. Pellegrini has the technical know how and has handled big egos before.

European Spots (Top 6)

Manchester City, Chelsea, Tottenham, Manchester United, Liverpool, Arsenal

Relegation

West Bromwich Albion, Hull City, Crystal Palace

WBA haven’t strengthened their squad and will be without Lukaku’s goals. Neither of Hull and Palace have the quality to stay with the big boys and at the end of 38 games, the gap in points will be reminiscent of the gap in class.

Best Player

Eden Hazard

The Belgian whizkid was Ligue 1′s player of the year for two consecutive seasons before hitting the English shores. Soon he will be the face of the Premier League. Jose Mourinho has the ability to bring out the best in players and his qualities should shine through.

Top Scorer

Robin van Persie

In the era of only a handful natural goalscorers, the Dutchman rules supreme. With him being the focus of all offensive schemes for Manchester United, he should net plenty of goals.

Breakout Player

Ross Barkley

Finally earned a starting place in Martinez’s 3-4-3 formation, the future English midfielder should make this season count.

Best Transfer

Jesus Navas

The biggest difference between Mancini’s City and Pellegrini’s City.

Biggest Disappointment

Steve Clarke and/or West Bromwich Albion

The Baggies will feel the absence of Lukaku and Anelka may be a lot of things but he is not in his prime.

Three off-the-hook predictions

Goal line technology to block out the nuisance

Mourinho interviews to only get better

Newcastle challenging for European spots