If Football Clubs were Computer Systems - Part One

WEST BROMWICH, ENGLAND – OCTOBER 20: Edin Dzeko of Manchester City celebrates his goal during the Barclays Premier League match between West Bromwich Albion and Manchester City at The Hawthorns on October 20, 2012 in West Bromwich, England.

The English Premier League (EPL) is one of the most widely viewed sports leagues around the world.

Some consider it to be the best football league, with a fan base spread all over the world. Today’s world has been revolutionized by computers and this article tries to compare various football clubs with computer systems.

Have a look:

Manchester City— Speakers

As they are fondly known by the other half of Manchester as “Noisy Neighbors” the component which comes to my mind is none other than blasting speakers. Last season, the noise was at its best as they turned their volumes up to an all-time high, thus toppling Manchester United from their No.1 position.

Manchester United— Hard Disk

MANCHESTER, ENGLAND – OCTOBER 20: Michael Owen of Stoke in action with Michael Carrick and Anderson of Manchester United during the Barclays Premier League match between Manchester United and Stoke City at Old Trafford on October 20, 2012 in Manchester, England.

Manchester United have been the undisputed champions of England for the past two decades and have also performed exceptionally well in Europe.

If the League gets digitised, then where will United take all their trophies and accolades they have gained during this passage of time? For this, they require a Hard Disk which can store all their trophies.

Since there is a large number of trophies I would say a huge-sized HD is required. Considering last year’s minor blip, I can say that the hard disk must have developed a bad sector.

Arsenal— Graphic Processing Unit (GPU) / Graphics Card

NORWICH, ENGLAND – OCTOBER 20: Arsene Wenger manager of Arsenal looks dejected as he stands on the touchline during the Barclays Premier League match between Norwich City and Arsenal at Carrow Road on October 20, 2012 in Norwich, England.

The graphics card can be simply explained as a chip which enhances the graphics i.e. the look-and-feel of the system.

For me, Arsenal are the Graphics Card. The way they go about their game, beautiful passes, attacking gameplay happening at a fearsome speed, these things add to the beauty of EPL and I thoroughly enjoy that.

And such things can’t be enjoyed by a Computer System without the GPU.

Chelsea— Monitor / Display Unit

LONDON, ENGLAND – OCTOBER 06: Eden Hazard of Chelsea in action during the Barclays Premier League match between Chelsea and Norwich City at Stamford Bridge on October 6, 2012 in London, England.

Chelsea have been flooded with tons of money ever since the Roman Abramovich era has begun. Bringing in players by splashing huge amounts of hard cash only add to the display of EPL with players being attracted from every nook and corner.

Thus, Chelsea are the Display Unit of this computerized EPL.

Liverpool— Restart Button

LIVERPOOL, ENGLAND – OCTOBER 20: Raheem Sterling of Liverpool is replaced by team-mate Jordan Henderson during the Barclays Premier League match between Liverpool and Reading at Anfield on October 20, 2012 in Liverpool, England.

A restart button, as the name suggests, starts the system from scratch once again. With every year passing, the number of mediocre performances are stacking up for Liverpool. What they desperately need after every quarter into the season is the Restart button.

The restart button is a real saviour in any computer system, which helps things begin again.

But Liverpool, in reality, just can’t have such magical button and therefore cannot start a new season as and when their distressing performances are at a peak.

Hence, after every year comes the statement: “Next Year will be ours!”