Punt on it like a pundit! Why I miss the "Focus"

I see United winning this one comfortably, with ‘at least’ a two goal margin. After all they had smashed seven against them last season”, exclaims an expressionless Steve Mcmahon, KOPing remarkably well for a normal Liverpool fan.

Meanwhile an old gentleman on the screen pitches in, “I think the Asian markets are providing very good value on United keeping a clean sheet, and since the match is being played at Old Trafford, the fortress should be impregnable.” His taut brow lines coupled with his grey hair, makes his otherwise ‘thoughtful’ musings and his ‘extra-ordinary’ prediction a lot more ‘believable’.

The end result though turns out to be a bit of a surprise, for the fortress is not only breached but conquered. Seven goals are scored, but United manage a paltry three, and no points for guessing who was cursing himself for the huge summer spending spree. The very next day, that was Monday, the ‘verdict’ is delivered with aplomb. The previously infallible United back-line, and the ‘unflappable’ David De Gea are pronounced guilty by, you guessed it: Steve Mcmahon, who surprisingly still looks devoid of any emotions.

Welcome to the amazing world of the ‘Pundits’, who are rather poles-apart from their religious namesakes. For the ‘religious’ gurus chant sacred hymns, and deliver ‘sermons’, which adds to the auspiciousness of the ceremony in progress, even if they are the only ones who are able to comprehend them while we simply incorporate the chants owing to their significance. In stark contrast, the football ‘Pundits’ enlighten us on well, football. So their rumblings are both looked forward to and scrutinized, while any ‘blasphemous’ remarks against a sacred club of the average fan leads to an uproar.

But just like no ceremony is complete without the blowing of the shell by the priests, similarly the footballing world, without their ‘pundits’, would become mute, loosing out on enigmatic characters who do play an important role in strengthening the connection that the fan has with the game and his favorite team in general.

For be it Gary Neville‘s orgasmic roar at Torres’s Goal which silenced the Camp Nou, or Alan Hansen’s now infamous, “You Will never win anything with kids”, rant which galvanized the fledglings, turning United into a force to be reckoned with while propelling those ‘kids’ into the lime-light.

For, let’s not be fooled by the serious demeanor and the exotic suits and forget that as much as they read the game, they, at the end of it, are fans too, probably with the added experience of facing the music in front of the advertisement boards rather than only chanting ‘niceties’ from from the stands. But the analysis provided nowadays pertains more towards speculation of the results, and everyone in the studio seems interested in only justifying their stance as to why they think that a particular team should prevail, or why a rolling juggernaut will be derailed.

Though this adds excitement and anticipation leading to an upsurge of adrenaline, somewhere down the line the essence of football is lost. For football is a game full of vivid characters, and unpredictable scenarios. It is as much about putting the ball into the back of the net as it is about defending with panache, and dazzling your opponent with the ‘tiki-taka’. Nowadays the pundits use the Tiger telestrator and other computer aided imagery to decipher team-tactics and formation. But amidst all this, the human element, the ability to manually dissect the strategies on display is lost.

For now, facts over-ride instincts. Precision is valued more than skill. For now nobody bothers to explain to the audience how an off-side trap is kept and how zonal marking happens. Instead, a blame-game ensues, which usually rests on the manager. Everything goes on so smoothly that you yearn for the friendly confrontations in the studio which sadly seem like a thing of the past. Be it Paul Masefield’s intelligent rebuttals, or Shebby Singh’s assertive claims, gone are those engaging debates.

And this brings back memories of a certain show which used to be hosted by a suave gentleman. Yes you guessed it right, it is indeed Football Focus with John Dykes. With his ability to moderate a ‘healthy-discussion’ like none other, he used to serve us an assortment of football goodies on our ever expanding platters. The all in one package gave due weightage to lesser talked about issues, like the managerial tactical battles, the need of technology in football, international selection conundrums, the ‘financial’ activities of the clubs and so forth. With razor-sharp analysis, informative dossiers, coupled with the right mix of humour, made this living room-experience an endearing and engaging ritual, especially for the Asian fans. While a solid core of pundits, who with their witty remarks, lurid descriptions, and non-conventional interpretations, made this program a winner on all fronts.

Compare this to the ‘Monday-Night-Verdict’, which portrays pundits as crusaders of footballing justice, who discuss whether to send someone from this world to the gallows, or whether the punishment meted out could be a little mellow. Essentially, their decisions being based on the score-line City-six, United-one. Nobody remembers Evans culpability in the attacker’s run, the analysis appearing more and more just for ‘fun’. Besides that, the multitude of football television shows on air leads to a repetitive and dour experience, clearly lacking the innovation and ingenuity of a ‘New Edition’.

But do not lose hope, for while your mother cooks Aloo-Gobhi in the Kitchen, don’t worry if you can’t Bend It like Beckham, for you can surely punt on it like a ‘Pundit’!