Humour: Crossover game between Pokémon and football to be released soon

Martin Squirtle, Eden Charizard and PikaMichu

Barely over a month after the release of Pokémon Omega Ruby and Pokémon Alpha Sapphire, Nintendo has dropped an unexpected bomb by announcing the release of a new Pokémon RPG (Role Playing Game). The twist this time though is that it will be crossed over with the popular sport of football for some new inspiration.

Overview

The game, which is still untitled, is rumoured to be hitting the markets by the second half of this year. The player will play the role of a scout from Chelsea, whose mission is to catch all the Pokémon out there who perform well, or are expected to do so in the near future.

A source from Gamefreak, who are the developers of the game, said, “We decided to start the game off from Chelsea because it matches the slogan of the franchise – ‘Gotta catch ‘em all!’ Chelsea too, try to capture as many players as they can in real life without having any real use for them, so we saw them to be the perfect candidate for our crossover project.”

At the start, the player will have three starters to choose from – Martin Squirtle, Eden Charizard and Pika Michu. Bulbasaur from the original games was removed as a starter because hardly anybody chooses it anyway.

Gameplay

The gameplay has been slightly tweaked to accommodate the characteristics and current affairs from the footballing world.

Once the player has caught six Pokémon in his team, the additional catches will be sent to ‘The Bench’ – a feature akin to the ‘Pokémon Storage System’ – which will comprise of all the reserve players. Some of them will never get first team experience, but then that’s expected as you are from Chelsea.

The game also comes with an additional feature for loaning your reserve Pokémon. All through the game, you will encounter scouts from smaller clubs, who would try to take some of your catches on a temporary basis. It is your duty to agree to the right move in an attempt to give false hope to your Pokemon of reaching the first team.

Abou Diaby retired from his playing career to replace Nurse Joy at the Pokémon Centre. He got the nod from the developers after having amassed loads of experience by staying at different hospitals. During his innumerable short-term internships at Arsenal, he also got some hands-on experience of seeing all kinds of injuries and ailments, which adds to his CV.

The FA disciplinary board replaces Professor Oak, telling us where not to ride our bicycles, and what we can and cannot post on social media accounts. Lionel Messi and Cristiano Ronaldo will be the duo of legendary Pokémon, and the player will have a choice to make as you can only catch one of the two.

Villains

Any Pokémon game is incomplete without its share of antagonists. This game has ‘Team Manchester City’ to fill in that role. With Sheikh Mansour at the top, the group is notorious for grabbing Pokémon from others once they fully develop.

The greed of this group is what propels their antagonistic behaviour. Being the lazy group that they are, Team Manchester City like to be spoon-fed with Pokémon who have reached close to their full potential, and do not train any of their own despite having all the top-notch facilities and capital needed.

A certain Arsene Wenger helps the player along the way to ward off the threat of Team Manchester City’s goons (read – scouts). Having been ripped off as manager at Arsenal in the very same regard of losing Pokémon, Wenger has hopes that he can put an end to the madness by helping the protagonist.

Special abilities and base stats

Since the Pokémon world has been populated with more variety, it only made sense to incorporate some new special abilities.

Luis Suarez has been given a special ability called ‘Jaws’, which gives him a 50% attack boost on every move using his teeth like Bite and Crunch. Arjen Robben has been given ‘Solo Warrior’, an ability which might see him attacking on behalf of his partner in a double battle (20% chance).

Fernando Torres has been given an interesting ability called ‘Young Gun’. This ability decreases the usefulness of the Pokémon as it levels up, hence making Torres useful only in the initial stages of the game.

There is another interesting feature wherein the base stats of the Pokémon you catch are determined from the region they are caught. For example, Pokémon caught in the faraway land of Barcelona have great attack but lower defence.

Gamefreak has even gotten in touch with EA Sports for tips on how to overrate certain Pokémon as they are more experienced in it, what with the FIFA games they come out with every year. There are more changes in these aspects, but we will have to wait until the release to find out all about it.

Suarez has been given the special ability ‘Jaws’

Marketing and target audience

Pokémon has largely been marketed as a game for children, but is equally enjoyed by young adults and adults too. Football, on the other hand, is a game that knows no age boundaries and is a hit with everyone.

Nintendo aim to exploit these factors and market the game more vigorously than the previous ones. In a tie-up with FIFA, they aim at attracting football fans to the fantasy world of Pokémon and also vice versa by introducing Pokémon fanatics to the beautiful sport of football.

As promoters, the plan is to rope in Jack Wilshere and Jordi Alba to get the job done. They are both imbeciles who act immature in spite of being expected to do otherwise. This is a perfect way to get the target audience relate – be it the college student playing the game sitting on the last seat, or the employee who is using office time to learn about chain breeding in the Pokémon games.

This is a surprising move from Nintendo and Gamefreak, and one that might even revolutionise the way that crossovers are done on any given platform. For now, this is all the information that has been revealed, and speculation is all that one can do as to what else the game might have to offer.

Hopefully, the game won’t leave much to the imagination like Liverpool without a Premier League title. And the producers will be hoping that they earn money at the rate at which Real Madrid spends it.

P.S.: Zlatan Ibrahimovic has approved of the soon-to-be-released game and has urged the developers to add him as the third legendary Pokémon in it.

Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction and should be taken with a pinch of salt.