Satire: What happened when top managers all over the world took the field

Disclaimer: This is a satirical article and is meant to be taken humorously

On the 32nd of the last month, a historic event took place at the Get Trolled Stadium. Managers of some top teams all over the world, gathered there for a Multinational Exhibition match, arranged by FIFA. The news about the match was kept secret, so secret that tickets were sold to only blind people. I was able to gather some information about the match from a reliable source. (The source is actually a sniper. He was present on the observation tower beside the stadium. As his target was late, he decided to watch the match.) Let me highlight some of the important events -

Event 1: The match was played between EPL XI and Rest Of The World XI (ROW XI). All of the managers were present except Tito Vilanova. He was replaced by Jordi Roura in the starting eleven of ROW XI.

Event 2: Roberto Di Matteo started for EPL XI. But after some good displays on the field, he was substituted by Rafael Benítez as an interim player. He did okay, but every body knew he was going to be substituted soon.

Event 3: José Mourinho was the best player of the match. He did not move an inch throughout the match. He stood just beside his opponent’s goalkeeper, and kept on poking his eyes every time a player from ROW XI made a shot on goal. Obviously, the goalkeeper was unable to stop the ball. No one could tell Mourinho a thing as he is the Special One. Moreover, as the referee was also blind, his actions went unnoticed.

Event 4: Roberto Mancini was the best player for EPL XI. He was seen everywhere on the field. Unfortunately, he was not chasing the ball. He was after the referee. He did not lose a single chance to argue with him. They even met at a restaurant for dinner after the match, to complete their arguments.

Event 5: A beautiful cross came form the flanks for EPL XI. The goalkeeper was not in position. But Sir Alex Fergusonseemed too slow to be able to take the advantage. But miracles do happen. Surprising everybody, somehow he was able to dart his chewing gum towards the ball. The ball changed its direction and entered the goal. Unfortunately for SAF, the goal was awarded to the owner of the gum company.

Event 6: Massimiliano Allegri was in the same situation as Benítez. But the difference was that he was in the starting XI. He tried to give everything on the field, but failed every time. Though the coach praised his game, everybody knew he was going to be substituted soon.

Event 7: Pep Guardiola returned to field after a long gap. At first, he was confused which team to play for. He even stated his ambition to play for EPL XI. But later changed his mind and was drafted into ROW XI, to replace Jupp Heynckes.

Event 8: Arsène Wenger scored a stunning goal. But the goal is up for sale. It will be awarded to the person who will pay the most.

Event 9: The winner of the match was La Liga XI, as declared by Fifa. They even gave the Man of the Match award to Messi.

Disclaimer: This is a satirical article and is meant to be taken humorously