For those of us who grew up with ‘The Boy Who Lived’ and loved it, not getting a letter from Hogwarts was the most disappointing experience of our childhood. Muggle or not, J.K. Rowling had us convinced that even we had a shot of going to the School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Many lazy days were spent wondering which house the Sorting Hat would send us to – Gryffindor for the brave, Ravenclaw for the brainiacs, Hufflepuff for the loyal or Slytherin for the cunning.
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It was easy for us to see our favourite things take on the surreal magic of Rowling’s brilliant world – it extended to our homes, pets, schools and for some of us, even our favourite football clubs. While many of us liked to see the team we supported as Gryffindor (the house of Dumbledore, McGongall, Harry, Hermione and Ron), the truth is most probably quite far from it. After all, there are only four Hogwarts houses and as such, only four teams can make the cut.
Putting all bias aside, here are the four football clubs that resemble the Hogwarts houses the most:
#1 Real Madrid - Slytherin
When it was Salazar Slytherin’s turn to imbue the qualities he valued into the Sorting Hat, he picked cunning and ambition. Think of Draco Malfoy, Tom Riddle, Severus Snape and Horace Slughorn. Irrespective of the choices they made in their life, all four were driven by ambition with a dash of cunning and trickery mixed in and Riddle, as we all know, became Lord Voldemort.
How is that any different from what defines Real Madrid? They definitely value ambition. A record-breaking 11th win in the Champions League this year made them the most successful European club of all time. And are the Los Blancos not cunning too? Pepe, Sergio Ramos, and Cristiano Ronaldo are clearly not above the occasional dive and fight. Remember all the times Draco and his cronies tried to get Harry and his friends into trouble at school? Reminds me a little of the fights at recent El Classicos, although Barcelona is no Gryffindor.
Video courtesy: Beautiful Football HD
#2 Liverpool - Hufflepuff
When Hogwarts was founded, Helga Hufflepuff agreed to take in all those who the other founders did not want in their house, sort of like Alberto Moreno and Mario Balotelli in Liverpool. Depicted as egalitarian, Hufflepuff house values hard work, loyalty and fairness much like Liverpool themselves, who despite no recent significant success have repaid loyalty with loyalty and never stopped persevering.
Within the enchanted walls of Hogwarts, Hufflepuff is portrayed as a house all the other students look down upon. With no claim to fame for the Merseyside club in recent years, they haven’t been seen as title contenders in a long time.
Well, maybe except the year when Liverpool was on the verge of winning the Premier League title but Steven Gerrard slipped and Chelsea managed to beat them. Then again, even Cedric Diggory came close to winning the Triwizard Tournament.
#3 Bayern Munich - Ravenclaw
Rowena Ravenclaw wanted her house to be home to the wisest, wittiest and most intelligent of all the Hogwarts students and in that sense are much like Bayern Munich in Germany. Famed for their academic prowess, members of Ravenclaw house are competitive and quick-witted and the most accomplished students in the whole school with the exception of Hermione Granger.
After the German club went through a bad patch, they completely overhauled themselves in the early 2000s and have since been a model of precision and excellence. Not only did they begin nurturing exceptional homegrown talent but created a system that attracted the best players from other countries.
To have the likes of Arturo Vidal, Mats Hummels, Manuel Neuer, Phillip Lahm, Thomas Muller, Frank Ribery, Robert Lewandowski, Jerome Boateng and Xabi Alonso all at the same time is remarkable for a club. They even have a crop of fresh talent that have great potential and promise.
#4 Atletico Madrid - Gryffindor
Most of us think our clubs are the bravest and the best much like Gryffindor house of Hogwarts but only Atletico Madrid seems to fit that particular bill. After many years of a Barcelona dominated La Liga, the daring warriors of Atletico and their fearless leader Diego Simeone turned Spanish domestic football on its head by winning the La Liga title in 2014.
They may have lost two Champions League finals in the last three years to rivals Real Madrid but their recent victories over Barcelona and Bayern Munich make them a force to be reckoned with even though they lack the biggest names in football. Atletico also discovered the great striking talents of forwards like Fernando Torres, Sergio Aguero, Radamel Falcao, Diego Costa and Antoine Griezmann.
Their Champions League group stage match against Bayern Munich a few weeks ago was evidence of their fearless and indomitable spirit that never cowers in the face of their toughest opposition.
