Would Luis Suarez secure or scuttle Arsenal's Champions League run?

Luis Suarez of Uruguay looks on during the FIFA Confederations Cup 2013 3rd Place match against Italy at Arena Fonte Nova Salvador on June 30, 2013 in Salvador, Brazil. (Getty Images)

When he joined Liverpool in January 2011, Liverpool was in 7th place, having taken 32 of 72 points (44%). Liverpool finished the season in 6th place with 58 points, having taken 26 of 42 points (62%) after his arrival, an improvement to be sure, but hardly a dramatic one.

In the years that Suarez has played for Liverpool, they’ve finished 7th in 2011, 8th in 2012, and 7th in 2013. In other words, he’s an exciting addition because he scores buckets of goals, but it doesn’t seem as if he changes a club’s prospects in any meaningful way.

Of course, he is just one of eleven men on the pitch at any given time, so it’s not entirely his responsibility to deliver salvation or shoulder condemnation. All the same, we’d be remiss to splash £40m, if not more, on a player who doesn’t alter his club’s aspirations for the better.

Liverpool didn’t suffer much from his suspension to end the 2012-13 campaign, finishing with three wins and a draw (against Everton) without him, which suggests that his presence or absence mattered little to the club’s place in the table.

How then would Suarez fare under the brighter lights and more-intense scrutiny of playing for Arsenal, pressing for a top-four finish (if not higher) and progress in the Champions League? It’s unlikely that he would respond with grace and dignity as each tumble on the pitch would draw howls of simulation from opposition fans if not referees, and every opposing player would look to get under his skin at every opportunity.

I don’t think we can afford—literally or figuratively—to sign this man. He is one instigation away from sabotaging our entire campaign. If it’s true that Arsène has £70m or so to spend, why invest more than half of it on such an unpredictable commodity?

No, thank you.

If we’re serious about brightening our prospects and £35m is the going rate for a top-flight centre-forward, please-please-please-please-please sign Higuaín. I all but guarantee that he will score and score and score again.

Real Madrid values him at £37m now? Fine. We can haggle down a few mil. The man’s no mere poacher. He’ll create his own shots and can score with the left or right, and he’ll do so without forcing us to defend his character or morals. Each Suarez goal will be met with a well-timed “yeah, but doesn’t he bite people every now and then?”

The last thing we need is a scorer who sees a tense run-in and decides he’d rather cut bait than stand and fight. If we sign Suarez and still somehow find ourselves scrabbling with Spurs, Chelsea, or Everton for a fourth-place finish, can we rely on him to keep his cool, or would we end up slapping our foreheads as he once again lets his club down through bites, dives, hand-balls or racist affronts? I doubt it.

Please, Arsène, please tell me that this Suarez bid is just a diversionary tactic and that you’ll announce Higuaín’s signing in the coming days. Please?