Atelophobia: The Fear of Imperfection and Its Impact on You

We are trained to be perfectionists, and anything apart from that is often perceived as unacceptable. Atelophobia is a fear of not meeting this standard, of being imperfect. This fear is real and incapacitating, and a lot of individuals in therapy don't even realize it's a problem, until they see its effect in their everyday lives and relationships.

For instance, while you were growing up, you may have been taught to meet certain standards for yourself—"you should be a good girl/boy", "you should look prim and proper," "only pretty girls get married," and other standards may have been oft-repeated during your childhood.

These are norms that you learn while growing up, and you may have still retained some of these. A phobia is an irrational fear that has pervasive effects. Atelophobia is a type of anxiety disorder that is characterised by an overhwelming fear of not living up to the standards.

We often develop social phobias due to conditioning. We are told to associate certain things. (Image via Vecteezy/ Stockgiu)

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What is Atelophobia? Is Atelophobia a mental illness?

This picture can be disturbing to many, but for some it can be a major trigger of imperfection. (Image via Vecteezy/ Weerawong)

Atelophobia symptoms can look different in each individual, but the common symptom is heightened anxiety and worries around any form of imperfection. While this condition has not been officially recognized by the DSM, phobia definitely is. If you do visit a mental health professional, they may assign a diagnosis after thorough assessment and analysis.

The symptoms of perfectionism are both physical and psychological. As soon as you realize that you have not been able to meet a standard, you may experience a sudden stroke of panic or fear.

While it is true that we see perfectionism as existing pervasively in beauty norms and standards, it can exist anywhere. Another area, where individuals may display this is productivity anxiety. We strive to be the best at our work, but we can't afford to fail at any point.

You may also criticize yourself excessively after you find yourself not meeting set standards. It pushes you to feel less about yourself, and you may develop low self-esteem as a consequence.

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What Is the Cause of Atelophobia?

We all have imperfections, but why do we pathologise them? (Image via Freepik/ freepik)

There can be multiple reasons that make you hold such rigid standards. However, most prominently, it is rooted in our standards as a society. Whether it is beauty standards or productivity standards, they all come from society's conception of what is "good" and "ideal."

However, it's not just the society but also the media that continues to spread the same message. A lot of clients experience heightened anxiety after viewing social media, since it serves as a reminder that they are not "good enough" or not "doing enough."

Finally, it may also originate in our homes. People continue to spread the message of conditional love in our communication patterns—If you do it perfectly, you are the best. However, if you don't, you don't necessarily deserve the love and wound. These can become traumatic wounds, which become etched in one's personality.

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How to Overcome Atelophobia?

You can learn to manage this phobia with professional help. (Image via Freepik/ rawpixel.com)

Internal beliefs are the lenses with which you view the world, your relationships, and yourself. Atelophobia can stop you from being the real you, but this can slowly change. With the help of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, you can learn to adjust this lens and view yourself from a realistic standpoint.

Exposure therapy can help you slowly explore your fear in a systematic manner and gradually become comfortable with imperfections. Most importantly, remember that you are not alone, and everyone has inner battles with imperfections and insecurities.

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All of us are meant to be imperfect. Even though the society will always have certain standards, perfectionism will always remain a social construct. While it may be difficult to break free from these standards, we all can start somewhere. With a professional, you can learn strategies for overcoming unhealthy perfectionism.

If you think that you are experiencing the symptoms of atelophobia, it might be a good idea to check in with a mental health professional and allow yourself to make that choice.

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Janvi Kapur is a counselor with a master's degree in applied psychology with a specialization in clinical psychology.

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