birthday sadness: Birthday Depression - why everyone does not have a happy birthday?

Birthday depression, sometimes known as the birthday blues, is characterized by a lack of joy, apathy, or interest in one's birthday. It's normal to experience birthday depression, and it's nothing to be ashamed of. Your emotions are real and, most importantly, under control. You may feel this way for a variety of reasons; depression is not the only one.

Birthday depression can include sadness as well as feelings of low energy or dwelling on the past, including all you may or may not have achieved thus far. These emotions may manifest in the days before a person's birthday, on their actual birthday, and for a while thereafter.

Not everyone prefers to celebrate their day of birth ; for some its a reminder of their mortality. (Image via Freepik/ Freepik)

What is Birthday Depression?

What do birthdays feel like to you? (Image via Freepik/ Freepik)

The celebration is frequently hindered by anger, social isolation, and worry for those who suffer from birthday depression. Birthdays are intended to be joyful events filled with festivities, indulgence, and uplifting introspection. On the other hand, other people experience dread each time their birthday approaches.

These people's chances of enjoying a birthday celebration are lowered since they experience anxiety, stress, and depression rather than excitement and joy. As a person gets older, it's normal to feel down about an upcoming birthday, however, this is distinct from ongoing sadness. At this juncture, it should however be known that the Diagnostic Manual (DSM-5) does not classify birthday depression as a mental health illness.

Symptoms & Causes of Birthday Depression

What accompanies this feeling or dread? Does everyone experience it? (Image via Freepik/ Freepik)

You may notice certain symptoms, such as but just not limited to the following, that indicate you are going through birthday depression:

Dread before or on the day of your birthday
Attempting to forget about that time and that age
Hating it when others inquire about your birthday
Being unenthusiastic about your day's festivities
Experiencing melancholy, fear, or rage on or near your birthday

Birthday depression may have different causes for different people. But they may also be accompanied by:

1) Anxiety about growing older

This might be true for "milestone" birthdays like 30 or 50 when aging is strongly stressed in some societies.

2) Celebrating your birthday under pressure

What will you be honoring? Why don't you seem more enthused? The temptation to admire and love your birthday might be debilitating and make you feel conflicted emotions.

3) Former trauma

For some, it is a reminder of something unpleasant or traumatic they may have experienced. (Image via Freepik/ Freepik)

Perhaps you had a challenging birthday as a youngster, or it serves as a remembrance of a terrible occasion. It's possible that the anxiety or depressive symptoms you first noticed after the tragedy will return.

4) Isolation

Your birthday may make you feel more isolated if you've lost connection with close pals or can't spend it with family.

5) High standards

It's normal to experience disappointment when friends and relatives don't live up to your birthday expectations. It's possible that you wished for a larger party or that they didn't seem to care as much about your birthday as you did about theirs. You can become depressed and irritated as a result.

Five Effective Tips to Cope Up with Birthday Depression

What can help us feel better? (Image via Freepik/ Freepik)

You can choose from a variety of therapies and coping techniques that can either completely cure or at least temporarily lessen your birthday depression:

1) Limit your expectations

It will be easier to avoid disappointment if you are honest about what to anticipate from a birthday. This might be particularly true if it involves getting calls from relatives that one might not get along with very well.

No matter how the day turns out, one should make an effort to find the good things and be grateful for any effort, no matter how tiny, that friends and family have made. No matter what, doing so will make their experience special.

2) A good day's start

It may not necessarily be the best day, but it can be made better. (Image via Freepik/ Freepik)

Starting by attempting to think optimistically is a smart idea. A person will be in a good mood to enjoy the remainder of their day if they do this. It would be a good idea to start each birthday by making a gratitude list.

Some ideas include making a special brunch and doing something joyful to start the day, like watching a movie on a mattress or going for a morning run.

3) Try something unique

Even if someone despises or hates their birthday, they can improve their experience if they create plans for it that will guarantee delight.

They might consider making reservations for a show, a massage, or dinner elsewhere. Anything likely to cheer them up and take their minds off the sadness they are experiencing may make them feel better.

4) Discover the ideal way to celebrate

It's okay to be a little bit selfish on birthdays. Some should strive to have a day like this if they enjoy lavish parties. If they would rather spend time with their family, they might arrange for it to happen instead.

5) Consult a Therapist

Use deeper self-reflection techniques while receiving therapy if you want to identify the underlying reasons why you feel down on your birthday.

Give therapy a try if the client is willing to explore these underlying causes of their birthday depression. Others might want to examine their feelings of grief around their birthdays, and they might find it helpful to discuss these feelings with a therapist.

There is no need for birthdays to be gloomy occasions, even though some people can feel stressed and melancholy. Your ability to process your feelings and cope may improve if you can recognize your symptoms and potential reasons.

A birthday may be anything you want it to be, so individuals should attempt to keep that in mind. These events can once again be enjoyable if people can get rid of these unfavorable emotions and make serious arrangements to deal with birthday depression.

Janvi Kapur is a counselor with a Master's degree in applied psychology with a specialization in clinical psychology.

What do you think of this story? Tell us in the comments section below.