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Taking the role of a caregiver for someone with dementia is not an easy route. As we learn more about individuals with dementia, we can't deny that it is a complex and multi-facteed condition. While the field of research for better treatment opportunities have advanced considerably, there is one factor that remains consistent over time, and that is the role of self-care in treating this condition.
Caregiving is not just about just taking care of the basic needs of an individual. It is a much bigger role that includes education, support, and management of well-being. If dementia is progressive, it can slowly lead to long-lasting and pervasive changes in one's life. Irrespective of whether you are a new caregiver or an expeirenced one, the path that you have taken is a proof of your love.
Coping with a Parent with Dementia
Dementia is a type of cognitive decline that can interfere with your ability to think clearly and also with other cognitive functions. All types of caregiving can be difficult, but when it comes to ones parents, it can be especially overwhelming and, sometimes, scary. It is okay to experience a mix of emotions, which can also include grief. Many caregivers experience this since they take the role of a parent, while parent expresses needs of a child.
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Caregiving usually is not a short season. Often it continues for many years. Your caregiving responsibilities may seem like an emotional roller-coaster that lasts forever. No one is perfect, and it is okay for you to make mistakes while you are on this ride.
If this is your first caregiving experience, feel free to seek as much support as you can. Trained professionals can assist you in delegating care responsibilities and also provide much needed validation. Coping also needs to be balanced with moments of victory that you and your parent are able to manage. If you don't think of these actively, then everything that you have done until now may begin to feel gloomy.
Most importantly, learn to set boundaries for your mental health. We want to do as much as we can for our parents, but at the same, thinking about their condition realistically is essential. Be realistic about the help and care you can provide. Additionally, be on the lookout for symptoms of compassion fatigue and if you are heading in that direction.
Caring for a Parent with Dementia
Caring for a parent with dementia at home can depend on the needs of your parent. Have they been recently diagnosed? Or are they someone who you see getting progressively worse? The first step is understanding the condition and its impact on the functioning of an individual.
This knowledge is multi-layered and acknowledges that this condition is a cluster of symptoms. As a caregiver, you must be on a look out for overwhelming signs that impact your loved one's well-being.
There are many types of cognitive decline, which affect an individual differently. As a caregiver, it is important to note that not all individuals lack agency. Infact, by enhancing their sense of agency and autonomy, you create a safe and productive environment for them.
As the caretaker, you will have to constantly remind yourself that your parent's behavior is not a result of their own actions, but due to the condition. At the same, it is crucial to be empathetic towards yourself and engage in self-care when time permits.
If there is one thing we know for certain, it's that everyone with dementia has a different experience. As a caregiver, try not to dwell on what went wrong. Caregiving can be a hard and taxing experience.
Caregivers for dementia are given much less credit than they deserve for their consistent love and support. If you know a caregiver, try to acknowledge the time and effort they put into their work. Best thing a caregiver can hear is that they are doing a good job.
As a caregiver for dementia strives to do better, they feel encouraged and motivated with the support they receive. This also becomes a protective factor for them in the long run from compassion fatigue or burnout. It's hard sometimes to recognize the progress individuals make. Hearing someone else validate efforts of caregivers of demential can be powerful.
Janvi Kapur is a counselor with a master's degree in applied psychology with a specialization in clinical psychology.
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