Early trauma often brings out images of catastrophic past events in our minds. It is usually only associated with abuse, accidents, disasters, or wars. However, it is essential to understand that early trauma can be anything that disrupts our ability to cope.
Let’s look further into the article to see how seemingly ‘normal childhood’ can be the reason behind your early trauma in the present times.
Signs of Early Trauma to Look Out For
Even very subtle negative experiences of childhood, which you tend to forget about as you grow up, can leave their imprints on your brain. These experiences have the ability to impact your day-to-day life even after years of their occurrence, leading to the development of early trauma.
Therapist Alexis Florentina Borja talked about early trauma in a recent Instagram post that said:
“This means, as children, consistent missed connection, lack of things we need, being seen but never heard or exposure to things that are too much for us can overwhelm our system leaving us to have to find ways to get through it.”
Let’s discuss nine signs of early trauma that you should look out for if you believe that your childhood was quite ‘normal’, but still, have difficulty coping up.
1. Being the Hyper-Independent Child
Children are constantly taught by parents to grow up and be independent. They are told to do their school work or household chores by themselves.
The kid often starts believing that it is a weakness to ask for help, and in the later stages of their life, they become very reluctant to seek assistance from anyone. Such parenting methods lead to the development of hyper-independence.
2. Being Self-Soother in Many Situations
Many parents are not emotionally available for their children. In times of stress, fear, or anxiety, the child becomes a self-soother for themselves.
While this is an essential skill, excessive self-soothing can be problematic. It hinders one’s ability to form deep emotional connections in the later stages of life.
3. Absence of Proper Communication
The inability to properly communicate often arises from early trauma of childhood, when the kid was discouraged from discussing their emotions in the home.
This destroys the foundation of communication within the person, leading to major difficulties in expressing themselves.
4. Being Told to Have No Boundaries
Telling your child to have no boundaries and discuss every single thing about their lives openly with you might seem like a good practice but it impacts their emotional well-being in the long run.
5. Absence of Safe Physical Touch
Safe physical touch is essential in everyone’s life, but it is more important for kids as it makes them connect, feel safe, and experience love. A child develops early trauma without the presence of safe physical touch.
The emotional well-being of the child is deeply affected by this. It makes them unable to maintain good relationships in adulthood.
6. Suppressing the Emotions
Parenthood revolves around addressing and understanding your kid's emotions in a good manner.
If the child constantly feels like their emotions are not important to the parent, they start to bury those emotions. This leads to a variety of psychological issues in adulthood.
In conclusion, early trauma can comprise anything that reduces our ability to cope with the things happening in our lives. It does not always need to be something drastic or disastrous. Many people experience early trauma even though they believe their childhood was quite normal.
It’s important to look out for certain signs of early trauma in your childhood to be able to understand your present behavior in a better way.