There are many good and selfish reasons why parents conduct strict parenting. Some demanding parents have high standards. They impart self-discipline in their kids by holding them responsible. The interests of these parents' children come first.
However, many strict parents are overbearing, as they worry that if their kids make mistakes, everyone will think that they're incapable of raising the kids. Such parents prioritize their personal sentiments and insecurities over the welfare of their children.
Do kids with strict parents perform better in school? While evidence indicates that harsh or authoritarian parenting might be beneficial in some cases, it frequently has negative outcomes.
Why do parents choose to adopt strict parenting methods?
The either-or parenting theory is the most common justification used by strict parents for their parenting style.
They don't want to produce rebellious children, as they believe that lax parenting breeds rebellious behavior in kids, so they adopt a stern parenting style. They think that parents can only be either lax or strict, and that nothing exists in between. While parents may not recognize that, it can also be traumatizing for children.
Effects of strict parents on growing children
Research on discipline regularly demonstrates that harsh or authoritarian child-rearing results in children who have poorer self-esteem, behave worse than other children and receive more punishment.
In fact, strict parenting causes behavior issues in kids, such as:
1) Increased rebellion
According to studies, teenagers and young adults who have experienced severe parenting have a tendency to be more irate and rebellious.
Just think about how most adults experience it to see why. As many experience a tough upbringing, we dislike being in charge even when we're the ones enforcing it. As a result, we struggle to control ourselves.
When we perceive a limit or criticism, that can manifest as anger and resentment, or as overreacting when we believe that somebody is trying to tell us how to behave.
2) Lower level of life satisfaction
A person's level of life happiness may be impacted by wholly authoritarian parenting practices.
For instance, a study that examined the relationship between parenting style and life satisfaction discovered that, across twn nations examined, parents who utilize only authoritarian methods significantly lower their children's life satisfaction.
3) Depression and anxiety
Authoritarian methods have been linked by researchers to poor mental health results in a number of nations, including teenage anxiety and depression. While parents may believe that it's an effective way of maintaining control, it can have severe effects.
4) Children learn that prevailing force always has upper hand
They acquire the ability to obey but not the ability to think for themselves. Later in life, when they need to challenge authority, they won't. They're more likely to follow their friends' lead and less likely to own up to their mistakes by claiming that they were merely trying to follow directions.
5) Internalize responsibility and self-control
Although strict rules may momentarily curb misbehaving, they do not teach kids how to self-regulate.
Instead, strict guidelines cause people to struggle with accepting personal accountability. Self-discipline is the most important internal skill for children, but it only comes from the internalization of loving boundaries.
Kids rejecting limitations that aren't compassionate is not unexpected, as no one likes to be constrained. They do not want to behave; rather, they perceive the locus of control to be outside themselves.
Given that no one likes being in charge, the strain that rigorous parenting places on the parent-child bond may have its most detrimental effect. You may need to spend a lot of time recuperating if your parents were very controlling when you were growing up. Losing adolescence to strict parents might leave lasting wounds.
To support you on this recovery path, it's a good idea to seek expert assistance. You can learn how to handle strict parents with the assistance of psychologists. There are those who can help you in learning more effective styles.
Janvi Kapur is a counselor with a Master's degree in applied psychology with a specialization in clinical psychology.
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