Ballon d'Or 2017 Award Ceremony Live

Since France Football have decided to call it a day, I've decided there is no reason why I shouldn't either. Leo Messi is 2, Neymar is 3, you can take my word on this (the eedjits still haven't announced who's at what position)

Thanks for the company! 'Twas fun!

Toodle-ooo!

HOW IS TONI KROOS ONLY 17th! PSHAW, I SAY, PSHAW!

They haven't announced who nos. 2 or 3, but you can guess who's who easily enough, no?

Cristiano Ronaldo Ballon d’Or @francefootball 2017 ! #BallondOr pic.twitter.com/XbPS7anVRL
— France Football (@francefootball) December 7, 2017

FIVE WINS FOR RONALDO

FIVE WINS FOR MESSI

As someone so wittily described it on that goldmine of wittiness, Messi has just let slip a 4-1 lead to go 5-5. How Liverpool of him!

Final ranking of Ballon d'Or France Football 2017 :

1st - CRISTIANO RONALDO

Live ranking : https://t.co/VCaRs94Ncc #BallondOr pic.twitter.com/nTqDckl0ex
— France Football (@francefootball) December 7, 2017

AND IT IS OUT!!!

THE WINNER IS CRISTIANO RONALDOOOOOOOOOO!

As the big man himself would have said, SIIIIIIIIII!

The Ceremony is happening at the Eiffel Tower... can you think of a better place on Earth where someone can win a giant-ass Golden Ball?

David Ginola is having a ball of a time talking to Ronaldo - NOOO NOT HIM, THE FIRST ONE - and the great man seems to be enjoying his time in Paris... much more than he did eleven years previously.

Just to recap, before we get into the podium places.. here's nos. 4 to 29:

#4. Gianluigi Buffon
#5. Luka Modric
#6. Sergio Ramos
#7. Kylian Mbappe
#8. N'Golo Kante
#9. Robert Lewandowski
#10. Harry Kane
#11. Edinson Cavani
#12. Isco
#13. Luis Suarez
#14. Kevin de Bruyne
#15. Paulo Dybala
#16. Marcelo
#17. Toni Kroos (HOOOOWWWW)
#18. Antoine Griezmann
#19. Eden Hazard
#21. Pierre Emerick-Aubameyang
#21. Leonardo Bonucci
#23. Sadio Mane
#24. Radamel Falcao
#25. Karim Benzema
#26. Jan Oblak
#27. Mats Hummels
#28. Edin Dzeko
#29. Phillippe Coutinho
#29. Dries Mertens

#4. GIANLUIGI BUFFON IS FOURTH!

The great man, who finished second to Fabio Cannavaro in 2006, will finish off the podium again. In all reality, he truly deserved at least a 3rd, if not a 2nd place finish

#5 LUKAAAAAAAAAA MODRIC!

The Magical little Croat had a sensational year, but in all reality - was he all that much better than Toni Kroos?!

Sorry, last time - or second last - time I complain about this. Promise.

Pinky Promise.

#6 is enigmatic Captain, red-card magnet, and all-round entertainer SERGIO RAMOOOOOOOOS!

Vamos Ramos!

UFFFFFF. L'Equipe are calling the Kylian THE PHENOMENON!!!

#7 KYLIAAAAAAAAAN MBAPPEE!!!

The hottest property in world football won plenty of admirers this year... but this is a touch of hype getting to the heads of the voters, neh? The lad is good and all that, but TEN PLACES ABOVE KROOS? Really?

L'Equipe are calling Kane the Prince, Lewandowski the Redoutable, Kante... you will love this.. the UNSINKABLE! WOOF!

#8 IS THE MAN WHO COVERS THE 1/4th OF THE PLANET THAT ISN'T COVERED BY WATER... N'GOLO KANTEEEEE

The man deserves every bit of recognition he gets, eh?

#9 ROBERT LEWANDOWSKI!!!

The Polish finisher extraordinaire will not be happy that he didn't crack the top 5, eh?

WE ARE INTO THE TOP 10

#10 IS OUT! And it's everyone's favourite Englishman... HARRY KANE! The Premier League's Golden Boot winner and owner of the most 40's hairstyle since the end of the World War probably deserves his place in the top 10, eh?

L'Equipe have given these players some niiiiice nicknames!!

Luis Suarez is the Fox

Edi Cavani is the Finisher

Isco is the Visionary

KdB is the Declencheur (whaaaaat, google can't help here - they aren't offering a translation)

Dybala is the Nugget

Marcelo the Tireless

Kroos is THE SURGEON (Wooof!)

Griezmann is the Elusive!

Hazard is the Unpredictable (which is so true)

David De Gea is the FARM HAND (what eveeeeen)

I am coming back to this... because the football lover in me doesn't allow me to sit quiet... HOW IS KROOS 17th? JUST, HOW!

Cavani really doesn't deserve the amount of hate he gets, does he? I mean the guy's numbers are simply phenomenal - and his incisive movement into dangerous areas and general selflessnesses are vastly underrated!

#11 EDINSON CAVANNIIIII!!!

As the very vocal, and very hungry, Ashwin Hanagudu just exclaimed with the simple delight of dawning realisation... For once in his life, poor ol' Edi Cavani, prolific as ever in 2017, has finished above Luis Suarez!

Isco was a force of nature in the second half of the last season... and proved to be the catalyst (along with someone else you may have heard of) that sparked Real Madrid's greatest season in the past half-century!

#12 ISCOOOOO DISCOOOOOOO!

The little magician dances his way to 12th!

There is a lot of left-over goodwill for Luisito, though, eh?

Although his 2016-17 stats do back him up, those who know him and have seen him at his best know that he is but a shadow of himself these days

#13 LUIS SUAREZ!

Luisito! The Barcelona sharpshooter makes it to 13th as a good 2016-17 tided over a pretty darn shoddy 2017-18 first half!

#14 KEVIN DE BRUYNE!

The Belgian, who has become the hub of Pep Guardiola's latest fount of footballing awesomeness, has had a stunning latter half to 2017, I'm sure that helped his case here.

I'm sorry, I still can't wrap my head around the fact that there are people who think there exist 16 better footballers than Toni Kroos. HAVE THEY NOT SEEN KROOS PLAY?

#15. THE JEWEL HIMSELF! PAULO DYBALLLAAAAA!

The Juve superstar will feel a touch aggrieved at such a low ranking after a scintillating 2017 - but if Kroos is 17...

#16 NOOOOWWW! MARCELLOOOOO!

The affable Brazilian does not have haters, does he? Who can grudge him this 16th, especially after the spectacular season he had with Los Blancos in 2016-17!

#17 IS OUT... TONI KROOOOS!

How is the best midfielder on the planet 17th on this, or any, list of best footballers on the planet! HOW!

#18 ANTOINE GRIEZMANNNNN!

Can't imagine the Frenchman who finished third last year would be so pleased with having finished so very low in the pecking order!

#19 EDEN HAZAAAAAAAAAARD!

Quite a few people would have expected the little Belgian to be higher than this, eh?

#20 IS OUT AND IT IS DAVID DE GEAAAAAAAA

Several people in Manchester and thereabouts are wondering how GOD can be anywhere but at the top...

SO THAT'S NOS. 30-20 for you

#21. Pierre Emerick-Aubameyang
#21. Leonardo Bonucci
#23. Sadio Mane
#24. Radamel Falcao
#25. Karim Benzema
#26. Jan Oblak
#27. Mats Hummels
#28. Edin Dzeko
#29. Phillippe Coutinho
#29. Dries Mertens

Not a shabby bunch there, eh?

#21 (tied) PIERRE EMERICK-AUBAMEYAAAAAAANG!

#21 (tied) LEOOOOOOOOOOOOOONARDO BONUCCI

Trust me, this wasn't for his performances with AC MILAN

The Senegalese speed-merchant has raced his way into the elite in double quick time. Mane has evolved into a deadly finisher and the heartbeat of a Liverpool team that can be scintillating at their very best.

#23 IS OUT NEXT - Sadio Mane

How can anyone begrudge the Colombian a place on this list? After looking like a lost soul during his torrid two-year spell in the Premier League it looked like the great man's career was approaching an unseemly, and untimely, end.

The Monaco happened, and El Tigre came roaring back.

#24 IS OUT AND IT IS THE MAGNIFICENT BEING THAT IS RADAMEL FALCAOOOOO!

#25 IS OUT... KARIIIIIIIM BENZEMA!

Millions of Madridistas have imploded as they see that the man who can't hit a barn door from a yard out is the 25th best footballer on the planet.

He did have a cracking semifinal against Atleti, though

How is Mats Hummels on this list? How did he make the shortlist? There are so many questions... so many doubts. The inimitable Ashwin Hanagudu is absolutely apoplectic that a player that spent more time on a hospital bed than the football pitch has more votes than Philippe Coutinho....

This appears to have been a slip of the ... mouse... where the official L'equipe channel has announced the last five list via separate, desperately cringe-worthy music backgrounded videos.

We will keep bringing you the names and numbers as soon as they are released by the official channel(s)!

THE FIRST FIVE... or the last five as it were... NAMES HAVE BEEN ANNOUNCED!

#29 Dries Mertens (tied)

#29 Phillippe Coutinho (tied)

#28 Edin Dzeko

#27 Mats Hummels

#26 Jan Oblak

Well, a round of applause for taking part, as Pierre de Coubertin once said - tralalala - not bad,though, to be in the top 30 best footballers on the planet!

But let's face it, after nine years we have all learned our lesson, there can only be two real candidates for any footballing award that denotes the best player in the world. So how do they stack up against each other in the calendar year?

Lionel Messi

Games: 61
Goals: 52
Assists: 14
Trophies: 1

Cristiano Ronaldo

Games: 56
Goals: 49
Assists: 13
Trophies: 4

Look at those numbers... look at the performances in the truly big matches - there can only be one winner, eh?

As things, erm, heat up, there are rumours flying about that Cristiano Ronaldo has won it... why heed unsubstantiated rumours, though? Why not simply let things take their natural course.

In the interests of whetting our appetites, who do you think would win if neither Ronaldo nor Messi were in the contention? My vote would go to the Kaiser that is Toni Kroos.

Hello and welcome to SK's live blog for the mother of all sporting awards - the Ballon d'Or.

While there is a very valid debate to be had on the debilitating effect that this innocuous golden ball has had on footballing fandom, most particularly those affiliated to the two men who have owned it for the past decade, now is neither the place nor the time... or is it?

Send in your views, negative and positive, on the Ballon d'Or to [email protected], or if you'd rather not use the world's most antiquated communications service tweet (at/to/what do you say here?) me @animenon19

L'equipe's famous ol' award ended its short-lived association with FIFA last year, and while the ridiculously named BEST awards were held with much, much, much greater fanfare than the older, more recognisable award last year - this time, the French magazine would well be out to set the record straight... and show the Swiss that no can organise a party better than a bunch of dedicated Parisians.

Ballon d'Or 2017 details

Timings: 6.45 GMT, 7.45 Local Time, 12.15 AM India Time... however the celebrities start rolling in a few hours earlier, so stay tuned from 9 PM India Time onwards
Venue: Paris
Host: David Ginola
Voters: 173 journalists from around the world

Contenders:

The "only guys who will win this"

Lionel Messi - Barcelona
Cristiano Ronaldo - Real Madrid

The "guys who will probably win this once those two retire"

Neymar - Barcelona
Antoine Griezmann - Atletico Madrid
Eden Hazard - Chelsea
Paulo Dybala - Juventus

The "guy who will probably win this once these four retire

Kylian Mbappe - Paris Saint-Germain

The "guys who must always ask - why do they even name us on this list?"

N'Golo Kante - Chelsea
Luka Modric - Real Madrid
Marcelo - Real Madrid
Edin Dzeko - Roma
Harry Kane - Tottenham Hotspur
David de Gea - Manchester United
Robert Lewandowski - Bayern Munich
Kevin de Bruyne - Manchester City
Karim Benzema - Real Madrid
Pierre Emerick-Aubameyang - Borussia Dortmund
Edinson Cavani - Paris Saint-Germain
Mats Hummels - Bayern Munich
Phillippe Coutinho - Liverpool
Luis Suarez - Barcelona
Jan Oblak - Atletico Madrid
Sergio Ramos - Real Madrid
Dries Mertens - Napoli
Radamel Falcao - Monaco
Sadio Mane - Liverpool
Gianluigi Buffon - Juventus
Toni Kroos - Real Madrid
Leonardo Bonucci - AC Milan
Isco - Real Madrid

Who will win? Who will not win? Does it matter? Does it not? Keep sending in your views and opinion as we continue our build-up to the big event.

Ballon d'Or 2017 Award Ceremony Live

Watch Ballon d'Or Live: Will Lionel Messi win his 6th or Cristiano Ronaldo his 5th? Ballon d'Or 2017