Before I begin, I love wrestling and am a WWE mark or smark, if you will. I am strictly for the PG area what with the Chris Benoit fiasco. Unprotected chair shots to the head are a big no-no in my book as is the infamous titillation the E’ employed during the attitude era.In my humble opinion, the in-ring product nowadays is probably the best it has ever been ( the smackdown six will have something to say about that). Anyway, the point I’m getting to is that WWE is focusing more on the kids demographic and making most of their decisions on the basis of that (See: John Cena’s never ending push).Alright, I like Cena, but there is a limit to everything. My patience with big match John ran out aeons ago. But, I digress. The E doesn't realize this but kids are not their major demographic with the average age of viewers being 41.4 years old as an estimate.The WWE must realize that they have to cater to more than just giggly 10-year-olds. This has never rung more true than now, with the Raw ratings reaching lows unseen for years. With that in mind, let’s look at the 5 most cringeworthy things about wwe in 2015-
#1 \'Tater Tots\'
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uh... yeah. Irishmen have potatoes Sheamus, you have tater tots. I get that the show is PG rated but this is ridiculous. The little laugh Roman does after delivering the line. Good lord.
This promo was right up there with ‘ sufferin succotash son’ and ‘JBL is poopy’. The Reigns-Sheamus rivalry hasn’t exactly set the world on fire, but any heat they built up, any tension that could be sensed was single-handedly evaporated by this one promo.
Yeesh, I still facepalm myself after watching it. Basically, everytime Roman Reigns was on the mic.
#2 Love Rectangle/Square (?)
This was all kinds of wrong. Let’s break it down, one vertex at a time. Rusev started the year on fire, defeated Cena at Fastlane, before losing to him clean at 3 consecutive PPV's.
Huh, way to kill a guy’s momentum. Along this time, Rusev’s manager was Lana, whose rise in popularity coincided with the Rusev-Cena feud. When Lana stood up to Rusev after being consistently mistreated, the angle had my interest.
That was it, however. The WWE’s next step involved making Lana more American. So, she allied herself with Ziggler, who never quite recovered from being ‘fired’ by the authority.
The introduction of Summer Rae and RU-ru was pathetic and unnecessary. Every single segment and part of this angle was so cringeworthy, it cannot be put into words.
The ‘fish segment’, the ‘proposal’, that video with cheesy overdubbed narration. It was truly bowling shoe ugly. The result was Rusev and Lana reuniting making this an even larger (didn’t think it was possible) waste of time.
#3 Commentary
Booker T is just not made for commentating. I hope rumours of him commentating under the influence are true because a man with a wresting school cannot call a spine buster a sidewalk slam. Also, its never quite certain when he will switch allegiances.
Michael Cole at Beast in the East was a refreshing change. On RAW however, with all the sponsor plugs and wwe network placards, Michael Cole is arguably the most punchable face on commentary. On the bright side, Lesnar destroying Cole was fun.
Jerry Lawler- 60 years old, 60 million years old jokes. Lawler/Ross were amazing. But its time for Vince to move on because Jerry Lawler is no longer up to the task. Even on a Smackdown team with Booker T and one of the Michael Cole clones (Brennan, Phillips or Saxton), King stands out for his cringeworthy commentary and ‘jokes’.
JBL- I used to like him. I’m not joking Maggle. But, his over the top, (nearly always innacurate) pop-culture references just make me sad. Really really sad.
Byron Saxton- See: Raw after Wrestlemania 31 and that time he yelled unity. Horrible.
#4 Steph McMahon
The one woman in WWE who has less charisma than Tamina. Okay, that may be a step too far, but there is something about Steph’s voice.
It sucks any and all excitement of whatever she is talking about. Divas Revolution- check, hyping a PPV main event- check. There is also the consistent breaking of kayfabe.
She is supposed to be an evil boss in storyline ( à la Vinnie Mac) as part of the authority but WWE invariably shows off her consistent charity work. It makes her hard to hate, which is not what the E want. But that voice, ugh, I hate it so.
#5 #Divasrevolution
Firstly, Team PCB, Team Bella and Team BAD are horrible names. Secondly, the point of the Divas revolution was to make us care about the divas.
So far, of the call-ups, Charlotte is a bad parody of daddy Ric. Becky Lynch is a gullible loser who doesn’t get any attention and Sasha Banks has gone from the boss to needing Naomi and Tamina’s help to beat Brie Bella.
Then, Nikki was allowed to beat AJ Lee’s record and hold on to the title. Charlotte’s title win was very underwhelming and the feud with Paige has been boring. Then there is the Reed Flair fiasco, which could have and should have been avoided, but obviously wasn't.
The problem with the revolution was this- Instead of pointless 3-4 minute matches, we were getting 9-10 minute ones. While the inring work has improved, each woman has a distinct lack of character and therefore, the revolution is now nothing more than a corporate shtick.
The incessant mentioning of the Divas revolution by the commentators has devalued its meaning. Everytime it is brought up, a facial muscle of mine twitches and I cringe... HARD.
