What does Taylor Swift meme 'mother is mothering' mean? Singer once joked about it being "totally different context than Mother’s Day"

Taylor Swift has one of the biggest fanbases in the industry. The fans, also known as Swifties, often come up with unique ways to connect more closely with the pop star. One of the most popular phrases that they started associating with Taylor Swift is 'mother is mothering,'

The term 'mothering' is actually used as a slang term within the LGBTQ+ community as an alternative word for 'yass queen' or 'slay.' It has a deeply emotional connotation in the queer community and is used to describe someone who carries a lot of emotional significance in one's life.

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Why do Taylor Swift's fans say 'mother is mothering'? Origins of the phrase explored

Opening Night of Taylor Swift | The Eras Tour (Photo by Kevin Winter/Getty Images for TAS Rights Management)

The word 'mother' has a unique significance in each person's life. It embodies a strong connection, a mix of emotions, and a tangible individual who plays a vital role.

However, the queer community often finds 'mother' as an ambiguous concept. For many folks, a 'mother' is someone who disowns, puts a condition to love, and often coerces them to conform to the quintessential societal norms. This is why they re-created the term 'motherhood' and associate it with people who shelter them emotionally and physically.

Several Swifties describe Taylor Swift as someone who gives them the emotional cushion they need to deal with life, i.e., mother them. The phrase 'mother is mothering' was first used in a tweet by the username @likedaylight as a caption for a picture of Taylor Swift with American actress Aisha Tyler.

Taylor Swift has also acknowledged the phrase. In her 2023 Eras Tour concert in Philadelphia, the Grammy winner cracked a Mother's Day joke and made a reference to 'mother is mothering.'

"Something that you guys are always saying online is ‘mother is mothering!’ Which I think you mean in a totally different context than Mother’s Day."

The Swifties were thrilled and grateful for this unexpected moment. Many called her a 'millennial,' while others saw it as breaking the 'fourth wall of mothering.'

Besides Taylor, many other superstars like Lady Gaga, Adele, Rihanna, Cardi B, Beyonce, and Rina Sawayama have been referred to as 'mother' in the past by their respective fanbases.

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Taylor Swift had once asked a fan not to call her 'Mom'

AFC Championship - Kansas City Chiefs v Baltimore Ravens (Photo by Patrick Smith/Getty Images)

Taylor Swift is also quite active on Tumblr and frequently uses the platform to interact with her fans. Once, a Swiftie took the 'mother' concept too seriously.

On Tumblr, a fan called Maddie shared a video of her mother complaining about Maddie calling Taylor her mom. Taylor came across the video and politely made Maddie see the reason. She said:

"Your mom birthed you. I was off playing in coffee houses. Your mom tended to you when you cried as a toddler. I drew lyrics on my arms and stomped around in cowboy boots while you cried in the night. Your mom taught you how to speak and read. I was like ‘come on! Let’s all have fun and jump around at this concert and paint our faces with glitter!’"

Thereafter, she requested Maddie not to call her mom because she hadn't earned the right. However, Taylor did allow Maddie to refer to her as Aunt Becky! Swift commented:

"So no, I have not earned the right to be referred to as your ‘Mom’. I’m more like your crazy aunt. So you shall not call me ‘Mom’. No, it’s Aunt Becky."

Aunt Becky is a reference to her 2014 Tumblr meme, in which she posted a vintage high school photo of herself in a tiara, and people randomly started calling her Becky. It's believed to have started when one user commented:

"This is a picture of my friend Becky. She used to be a happy, popular girl until one night, she snorted marijuana at a party. She died instantly. Please, don’t do marijuana. It’s the most dangerous drug out there. Please don’t wind up like Becky."

Despite people saying it was Taylor Swift, other fans jokingly kept insisting, 'No, it's Becky.' The post went viral and eventually made its way to Swift as well.