"On my very first day, I was shaking" - When Michael Phelps recalled his first day at treatment following DUI arrest

Michael Phelps once revealed that he was shaking on his first day at the treatment facility following his toughest phase of depression in 2014. The 23-time gold medalist later made a comeback at the 2016 Rio Olympics, winning an incredible five gold medals.

Phelps had won an unprecedented 18 Olympic gold medals before retiring from the sport following the 2012 London Olympics. However, what followed was the swimmer's "hardest fall".

“I didn’t want to be in the sport anymore … I didn’t want to be alive anymore," he told CNN in 2018.

The Baltimore Bullet struggled with mental health issues and alcohol and drug addiction. At one point in 2014, he didn't leave his room for several days and later made headlines for a DUI (driving under the influence) arrest as well, which also marked the start of his road recovery.

However, Phelps' first day of treatment didn't go smoothly. The 39-year-old has recalled being extremely nervous as well as angry during his initial days of recovery.

"I remember going to treatment my very first day, I was shaking, shaking because I was nervous about the change that was coming up. I needed to figure out what was going on," Michael Phelps said.

On his first morning at the treatment facility, Phelps was asked by a nurse about how he was feeling. The Olympic champion had replied angrily:

“How do you think I feel right now, I’m pretty ticked off, I’m not happy, I’m not a morning person."

However, the 28-time Olympic medalist gradually began talking about his feelings and it wasn't long before he was grateful to be alive.

“Those moments and those feelings and those emotions for me are light years better than winning the Olympic gold medal. I am extremely thankful that I did not take my life," he added.

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Michael Phelps: “My depression and my anxiety is never going to just disappear"

Michael Phelps speaks at the NASCAR Cup Series Championship Race (Source: Getty)

While Michael Phelps did recover significantly following his 45-day stay in the treatment center and later won five more gold medals at the 2016 Rio Olympics, he believes depression and anxiety will always remain a part of him.

“My depression and my anxiety is never going to just disappear. I’m never going to be able to snap my fingers and say ‘Go away. Leave me alone.’ It makes me. It is a part of me. It’s always going to be a part of me,” he said in an interview with Healthline.

However, the 39-year-old explained that it was a process of trial and error and would take time to achieve good results.

“Throughout my career, there was no blueprint on winning eight gold medals; it was kind of trial and error that we had to figure out a way to get there. So, for [my mental health] …I can’t expect to have every answer today, but I also have to give myself forgiveness because I’m still learning and at times that is hard," Michael Phelps added.

Phelps retired in 2016 as the most decorated Olympic athlete in history and has since remained a firm advocate of mental health in sports and life. He also was in support of Simone Biles when the gymnast withdrew from the Tokyo Olympics due to twisties.