5 worst wrestling matches of 2007

If you read about wrestling, by now you’ll have heard the name, Vince Russo. He’s one of the most polarizing figures in wrestling history, is tolerated by some, and despised by most. Some people credit his ‘crash TV’ style and ideas as being catalysts in WWE’s victory over WCW in the Monday Night Wars.

Others, however, point to both WCW and TNA as examples of what happens when Russo doesn’t have someone stopping him from executing his ideas to their fullest. You see, in WWE, Russo did have creative influence, but Vince McMahon would shut down some of his wilder ideas. WCW and TNA, however, gave him free rein over the creative direction because they thought his ideas would eventually lead both companies to compete with WWE.

We’ve already covered his utter nonsense in the articles that showcased the worst of WCW, so now it’s TNA’s turn. The biggest difference now, however, is that most people knew who he was when these matches were executed, which is why you could head extremely loud chants of ‘Fire Russo’ when they took place.

So what could be so bad that fans would actually chant for someone to get fired? Read on about the worst matches from 2007 to find out…

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#5 The Great Khali vs. Batista – SummerSlam 2007

The Great Khali did not really impress with his run as the World Heavyweight Champion

This was one of the lowest points in the history of the World Heavyweight Championship. The Great Khali was an abhorrent wrestler, whose biggest asset was his gargantuan size. But his actual wrestling ability was so threadbare that all he could do was some lazy chops, kicks and one two-arm Chokeslam.

So when WWE made him World Champion, a lot of people got angry and begged for someone – anyone – to take that belt off him and restore some dignity to it. At SummerSlam, those people put all of their hopes on Batista’s enormous shoulders, hoping and praying he’d win and end the nightmare that was Khali’s title run.

They went home disappointed.

Not only was this match scheduled in the death-slot (i.e. the bathroom-break spot before the show-closing main event), but the action didn’t make any sense. The whole story was about Batista not being strong or tough enough to overcome the massive Khali.

Khali dominated most of the match and had the size advantage over Batista. Yet instead of concluding that story in a logical way by having Khali win clean, Khali hit Batista with a chair and got himself intentionally disqualified.

That was a cheap cop-out to keep the title on Khali without Batista taking a loss. He was moments away from winning the match on his own but someone decided that they needed to ‘swerve’ the audience with an unnecessary DQ.

Finally, the World Championship – the Big Gold Belt – was defended in a nothing match that lasted less than seven minutes. That should tell you everything you need to know about how important this title was to WWE’s top brass at the time.

#4 Christy Hemme vs. The Big Fat Oily Guy

Christy Hemme was not looking forward to this match

The story behind this match was that Christy Hemme wanted to wrestle and not be eye candy (this was before TNA had the Knockouts Division), and was lambasted by her male counterparts for wanting to do this. As punishment for ‘stepping out of line’, Hemme was given the match she was asking for. Except it was a ‘tuxedo match’, which involves disrobing your opponent. And her opponent was…a Big Fat Oily Guy (that was his actual ring name).

This ended up being a lose-lose situation. If Hemme lost, all the bad things said of her would’ve been proven true. If she won, we’d have to see the Big Fat oily guy get his clothes ripped off, and nobody wanted to see that.

The only good thing about this match was that it was short, and in terms of long-term storytelling, the right person (Hemme) won. It only went about three minutes, which is fine given the gimmicky nature of the contest, but by no means was this entertaining or enjoyable. Inter-gender singles matches are rare, and they’re awkward more often than not. This felt less like a wrestling match and more like a Vince Russo-booked softcore porno, complete with the crotch-in-face segment.

Whoever said TNA would save wrestling following WWE’s victory in the Monday Night Wars clearly had no idea what was to come.

#3 Team 3D vs. LAX – Lockdown 2007 - Electrified Cage Match

Team 3D vs. LAX

A prime example of ludicrous wrestling writing, this match can be best described as ‘asinine’. You had two tag teams who, under normal circumstances, could put on a good match together. However, this wasn’t just a normal cage match they were in; they were in an electrified cage match.

The basic concept was that there was some kind of electrical current connected to the steel cage, meaning that anyone that physically touched the cage wall would be ‘electrocuted’. Now, electricity isn’t usually seen outside of a natural lightning bolt, so the creative team in TNA had to do something do show fans that the wrestlers were being ‘electrocuted’. They did this by flickering the lights on and off and having the wrestlers convulse in a fake way as if electricity was coursing through their bodies.

As if this wasn’t enough, the bookers came up with a ‘way out’, of sorts, to deal with the cage being electrified. All a wrestler had to do was put on a pair of ‘rubber gloves’ and this would negate the effects of the electrical current (hey look, it’s TNA: The RPG, where you equip these magic items and you’ll be able to surpass the electrified cage).

How anyone could book this nonsense is still a mystery to this day.

#2 Finlay & Hornswoggle vs. Boogeyman & Little Boogeyman

Finlay and Hornswoggle had a long run together in 2007

Poor Finlay. He was known as one of the toughest men in wrestling at one point, and was well-respected for his dedication to his craft and being a good worker. Alas, here he was stuck working in an awful gimmick match that involved two gimmick wrestlers and the Boogeyman. As you can imagine, this was awful.

Instead of having a competitive match, the bulk of it saw Finlay beating up Little Boogeyman. Yes, a fully-grown man beating up a little person with his shillelagh. Worse, this little person actually got some offence in and got a near-fall on Finlay with a small package (insert joke here). Had Finlay actually lost there, I’m certain he would’ve quit the wrestling business right away.

As for the regular Boogeyman, his offence was poor and boring, and he spent more time chasing Hornswoggle (then known as The Little Bastard) before Finlay pinned the diminutive Boogeyman.

It was corny and boring. Now, sometimes this sort of wrestling can be entertaining, but this wasn’t one of those cases. There was too much slapstick without much thought put into it, leaving us with a disappointing affair that left possibly everyone disappointed.

#1 James Storm vs. Chris Harris – Six Sides of Steel Blindfold Match

This was voted Worst Match of 2007 by the Wrestling Observer Newsletter, and it's easy to see why

If you were to make a list of stupidest gimmicks in wrestling, the blindfold match would top that list. After all, how can two or more wrestlers put on a captivating match when they cannot even see each other? TNA officials didn’t seem to have this basic concept in mind when they booked two otherwise great wrestlers in a match that’s so bad it’s almost comical.

There’s very little action as the match begins, which soon leads to fans chanting for TNA to ‘Fire Russo’. After all, if they can’t see each other, what is the point of the cage?

It only got worse from there as both wrestlers’ blindfolds came off several times, which destroyed what little suspension of disbelief there was in this match. Not only that, but there were some moments that were so unbelievable (a spear and a full nelson slam, both of which were from a blindfolded attacker) that it made it more blatant than ever that this was pre-rehearsed. How could anyone take this match seriously?

The fans hated this match so much, and rightfully so. There were chants for ‘Fire Russo’, ‘End this match’, and, of course, ‘boring’. The match concept was completely asinine, and really hurt TNA’s reputation as an acceptable alternative to WWE. I’m certain people in Stamford, Connecticut was laughing at this knowing they had nothing to worry about regarding TNA ever being seen as ‘viable’ competition.