The Goldberg conspiracy
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The most surprising thing Big Willy G has been up to, though, has to be that he has actually been wrestling in WWE the ENTIRE TIME. Remember earlier when I said he’s only wrestled once since leaving the WWE? Yeah, that’s an old writer’s trick called “lying” us professionals incorporate into our work sometimes.
Using a couple of James Cameron’s new filming techniques that have yet to be released to the public, Goldberg was in fact digitally disguised as...RYBACK. That explains the “Goldberg” chants that only happened at live events. The audience wasn’t seeing him through the RyTV lens, so they saw Goldberg returning for the first time in a decade, while us marks at home saw The Ryback. Sure, WWE tried to kill the rumours off through bullying and intimidation tactics (so much for being a star, Vince) but we all know the truth.
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Think about it: there is undeniable proof that Goldberg eats enormous amounts of food, and Ryback can’t stop talking about being fed more. Neither have hair on the tops of their head. They both wrestle, and in a similar fashion. Ryback’s nickname as a teenager was “Silverback.” Goldberg’s real name is “Goldberg.” Goldberg, Silverback. Gold, silver. Silver, gold.
And possibly the biggest, most damning evidence that Goldberg is, in fact, Ryback is...
*cues Inception soundtrack*
...they have never been seen together in the same room.
Case closed.
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