Kane's See No Evil: A new perspective on a classic

Act II

I wonder how much Kane can...deadlift. Nailed it.

Quick roll call: Boy Chaperone and Girl Chaperone (chappies for short) are getting drunk together in a submarine (?) and Boy Chappie still only has one arm.

Michael and his guy friend who smuggled the drugs in are ready to do a drug party, the other two Indianapolis Jones’ are fake sleeping in order to later do a sneak-a-bout in hopes of finding money, The blonde girl is down to drug party and Christine is probably being angrily pensive somewhere.

One girl is naked in the dirtiest shower I’ve ever seen and I don’t even know where the fourth girl is or what she looks like. I have no idea where Old Lady Innkeeper is, but if she’s still around, I’d keep my eyes on her. Very suspicious that she’d just chill at the hotel with a bunch of weirdos and rats.

The Jones’, or the Treasure Twins as I call them now, find a dead body that is missing it’s eyes. In a panic, they get split up and uh,oh...KANE! And he has a giant metal hook that is attached to a chain for pulling purposes? Yup. Pulling purposes. Pulls Treasure Kid #1 right into the elevator by his hooked ankled.

This causes the elevator to elevate so Girl Chappie is off to investigate! She gets investigated right into the ceiling of the elevator by Kane (now hookless, still maskless) and he pulls her eyes out. He keeps them in the same jars that The Club kept Big E’s testes in.

After lazily attempting to rape the shower girl on his way to the drug party, Michael joins back up with his drug buddy and Blondie and Veggie (fourth girl is a vegetarian, I just recently learned) and they go looking for a cool drug party room.

Kira is having none of these hotel shenanigans and is all around just a bummer to be around, so Christine tells her to escape she must jump through a hole in the wall and above all, have fun!

So Kira goes to The Kitchen Of The Damned and hurts herself multiple times just being in there. This alerts Hooked Kane and he shows up in one of those hotel mini elevators. What’s it called? A lazy Susan? A hobnobber? A Lift-Ease?

I can’t remember but around this time Guy Chappie and Treasure Kid #2 deduce that GC shot Kane in the head at the beginning of the movie and Kira has religious tattoos so he’s probably not gonna kill her, just take out her eyes, right after instructing TK #2 and Christine to beat feet outta the building, Guy Chaps gets fish hooked through the ceiling, de-eyed, then dropped back down.

Michael and his drug posse find a suitable room to experiment with narcotics in but WHOOPS! Kane is watching through one-way mirrors. Kane’s eyes are pretty messed up looking, so I don’t know if he’s trying to get some new, fancier eyes, or if his motivation is he just hates other people’s eyes.

He left his last victim eyeless but alive because she had religious tattoos, Guy Chappie said. And I guess he’s into religious tattoos but it doesn’t seem to me that he likes religion, at all. But like, if he hates religion so much why is he NOT killing the victims with God Tats?

Or does he just love religion so much that he couldn’t possibly kill someone with a cross inked on their back, but living life as a murderous psychopath is acceptable? And who signed off on this three day field trip to a building that I can only assume has had numerous failed inspections?

It seems to me that Kane’s costume for this movie cost next to nothing. He looks basically like he does in everyday life. Bald, raggedy clothes, weird eyes and face, tall. He may have fake fingernails on but I don’t know enough about fingernails to say one way or the other.

We are given insight to his mental state through shaky filmography and the pride he takes in the cleanliness of his living and work spaces. We learn that he’s very indecisive since he can’t seem to pick a place to keep Kira and stick with it. Also, I’m about halfway through this movie and it sucks.