Last week on The Challenge, CM Punk barely survived a football player, Wes sent Bananas packing, and Lolo got moody. This week is a Women’s Elimination, so Punk is safe, so I can breath easy during this week’s episode. We’re halfway through the season (I think), so we’re starting to get a closer look at each contestant. This is always better than the first few episodes of a competition-based reality show.
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Some shows, like Surviving The Race, Master Rescue, The Amazing Road Rules, or Redneck Island, always start with 50 people, and they only have a limited time with each episode to introduce them. When the numbers dwindle, we get to see the character of these people a little more closely. Most of these people are awful. It’s already apparent with the Champs, since we’ve seen them on these shows for years, but I was hoping the Pros would be better humans. For the most part, they’re not. They’re either cliquish bullies or Lolo. Lindsey seems ok, though, and she volunteers to be team captain for the Pros. She’s a snowboarder by day and apparently a badass by night. We’ll get to that later.
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Big poles and even larger moats
The first challenge is called Out Of Bounds, where you face off one on one by holding on to a big pole and trying to push your opponent into a moat. I like how these are games designed so that when adults play them, they look like toddlers. Ashley M is the captain of the Champs, inexplicably volunteering for the position AGAIN, even though it sent her to Elimination the first time. I applaud her willingness to put all on the line for her charity, but I do question her decision-making skills. Since this is a strength game, or “Brawn,”(sup, Strowman?) and all the Champs got is CT, the Pros pull off the win. The actual fun doesn’t really start until it’s time to vote on who will be going into Elimination. On the Champs side, Ashley M is already in for being Captain of the losing team.
So in an act of chaos, Wes ties the vote up between sending Cara Maria or Ashley K in. This means Ashley K gets to choose who she’ll face in Elimination. She picks Ashley K because Cara Maria is a beast and would destroy her. This is where CM Punk learns a new trick.
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Lolo vs. the world
Lindsey, being the Captain of the winning team, is safe from Elimination and gets to pick the first person going in. Lolo is again getting the most heat, due to her attitude, and it’s not just from Louise anymore. She rubs everyone the wrong way when she asks for a “day off” from the game, especially Lindsey.
So Lolo, who thinks everybody is against her now, which they are, especially Louise, gets super crybaby about it. Here’s where Punk uses a strategy he learned from the Champs: Tie up the vote and let the person sent in already pick who they want to fight. So the Pros tie it up between Louise and Tia, allowing Lolo to finally square off against Louise. She even says that’s what she wants to do, and it’s clear the tension between Lolo and Louise is about to pop off, so what does she do? She picks Tia, who’s about a quarter of the size of her.
Lolo vs. ????
At Elimination, the game is like a chest high basketball game played with pads and a medicine ball. What did I say about adults looking like toddlers? Ashley K vs. Ashley M ends when Ashley K accidentally scores on herself and Ashley M drains a jump shot where jump shots shouldn’t exist. Kinda cool, A-K was definitely the weak link. Hold on to your potatoes, though, because Livid Lolo is about to take on Timid Tia! But something’s been bugging Team Captain Lindsey. She can’t shake the thought of Lolo asking for special treatment, and just Lolo in general, I think. So, in a move that’s both mindboggling and baller as hell, at the last second, she asks Host Victor if she can sub in for Tia and go DIRECTLY against Lolo.
The Champs are dumbfounded, and Lolo seems like she’s into the idea, for the first time ever. Unfortunately, the show throws up the “To Be Continued…” nonsense, and we have to wait a week to see how this plays out. Well dones for Punk, for learning how to play the mind games quickly, and double for Lindsey, for putting herself on the line for no good reason other than spite. That’s good TV. I hope next week doesn't suck.
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