The Quickie And The (possibly) Dead
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Nikki spent most of the first episode and this episode convincing Brie to have a quickie with Bryan. After the heist is pulled off, Brie admits she’s not that into quickies and likes the comfort of her rock lamp there to set the mood.
Nikki ALSO doesn’t like Brie having quickies either, now, mainly because she suddenly doesn’t want to hear about her sister’s sex stuff and how they didn’t shower after. Come on, Nikki, you did this to yourself. Buck up and listen to your sister tell tales of Kama Sutra’s Cliff Notes.
Female superstar says she inspired John Cena turning heel HERE
Don’t bring it up if you physically can’t run away from the conversation is the true lesson here.
Since this is the first time Bryan has had sex in a month, he celebrates by crawling around like a crab, looking for his missing shoes. John says he doesn’t wanna hear about their sex life so Nikki tells him anyway because I guess she DOES want to talk about her sister’s sex stuff and nobody listens to anyone in this house.
Like a damn gentleman, Cena tells Bryan that since his most recent boner joke was very good, he won’t make him look stupid and try to top it. Nice guy, that Cena. For now. We’ll see, there was a Josie sighting in the third act, but Bryan and Brie could conceivably be Weekend At Bernie-ing her.
My suspicions were strengthened by the two of them wearing “Dog Dad” and “Dog Mom” t-shirts. Seems like a cry for help to the producers. This could get bad. Like, Voodoo black magic bad.
John reverts back to crazy and gets mad that Nikki lied about her caloric intake so now all marriages are CANCELLED. This is quickly resolved when Nikki declares that she loves food AND attention from “her man” so John thinks that’s fair. Phew, that was a close, I just hope Kathy and Johnny can find a way to make THEIR marriage work, now that it’s officially back on.
Around this time Brie is preparing for her upcoming retirement match and she’s training with LANA! I guess Lana is practicing for an upcoming movie role because she spoke with an American accent the whole time and I could barely recognize her but I’m pretty sure it was Lana. What happens next will blow your mind…
