What did Nikki Glaser say during Tom Brady's Netflix roast? All jokes and punchlines by the stand-up comedian

The most well-known celebrities who took the stage to joke about Tom Brady during "The Greatest Roast of All Time: Tom Brady," a Netflix live event that happened on Sunday, included Ben Affleck, Kim Kardashian, Nikki Glaser, Robert Kraft and Rob Gronkwoski.

Comedian Nikki Glaser, who delivered some of the finest lines of the night, referred to the roast as "the comedians' Super Bowl" because of the intense competition among the participants as they tried to outdo each other.

Even though Andrew Schulz, Jeff Ross, Julian Edelman and Kevin Hart had their moments, Glaser was the one who stole the show. Let's look at some of Glaser's best lines from the Tom Brady roast:

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Nikki Glaser roasts Tom Brady’s 30 million crypto loss

While most roastmasters concentrated on Tom Brady's football career and his separation from Gisele Bundchen in 2022, Nikki Glaser used her own lines to create something more distinctive.

Brady served as an FTX cryptocurrency exchange advocate after retiring, but he reportedly lost a whopping $30 million in investment after the company's catastrophic failure.

Glaser included that in her arsenal of resources to make fun of the seven-time Super Bowl winner.

“Tom also lost $30 million in cryptocurrency. How did you fall for that, Tom?”

She then brought up former NFL tight end Rob Gronkowski:

“Even Gronk was like, ‘No, that’s not real money’!'”

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Nikki Glaser joked about Tom Brady's rings

Nikki Glaser also spent some time making jokes about the former New England Patriots quarterback's marital ring and Super Bowl rings.

Gisele Bundchen and Brady were married for more than 10 years until they divorced in 2022. Glaser made sure to include it in her quips:

"Most career touchdowns, most career wins, and five-time MVP of the Super Bowl. You have seven rings. Well, eight, now that Gisele gave hers back. But sorry, Tom, the only thing dumber than you saying yes to this roast was when you said, ‘Hey, babe, you should try jiu jitsu."

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Nikki Glaser roasts Tom Brady for relationship with Bridget Moynahan

Roasts allow for the discussion of any subject, and Nikki Glaser capitalized on that by making a joke about Brady splitting from his then-girlfriend, a pregnant Bridget Moynahan.

Brady had been dating Moynahan for more than three years before they split up in 2006, but it soon became clear that she was expecting his child.

"But seriously, Tom, you're the best to ever play for too long," Glaser remarked. You know, you retired, then you made a comeback, and then you went back to retiring.

"Well, I get it. It’s hard to walk away from something that’s not your pregnant girlfriend. To be fair, he didn’t know she was pregnant. He just thought she was getting fat, and Tom hates fat.”